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  1. Public Bookmark *

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    The part of Shane that is not panicking goes soft with how…eager Ilya seems for Shane and Svetlana to meet, for Shane to like her. It’s strange, it’s new, it’s wonderful to be able to think about making plans like this. Dinner with Shane’s parents, meeting Ilya’s friends, like that’s something they can have.

    So that’s why Shane beats down the urge to crank up the gas on the stove and light a match, gives Ilya a wide and normal grin, and says “Yeah, of course. I’d love to meet Svetlana.”

    Ilya sighs and his eyes light up and, oh, Shane wants to love him in the light of day. Suddenly, Shane has an idea that will hopefully stop him from doing something rash that will get him on the news and/or in prison. “And you should meet Rose!”

    or: shane hollander tries to get over his overwhelming urge to blow up svetlana vetrova with his mind at saturday brunch

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,786
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    263
    Kudos:
    5,069
    Bookmarks:
    758
    Hits:
    31,690

    18 Sep 2026

  2. Public Bookmark *

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    Cliff Marlow ✅ @cliffmarlowofficial
    Top three reasons why @officialilyarozanov and I aren’t fucking, from least to most important:

    #3: I’ve known him since he was barely 18 years old. I’ve seen some shit.
    #2: He’s annoying. And an asshole.
    #1: I’m scared of his husband.

    [Attached is a gif of Shane whirling around to glower at the camera. The look in his eyes promises murder. Why? Unclear but also irrelevant. If looks could indeed kill, everyone who’d ever seen this gif would be deceased.]

    [Can be read as a standalone story.]

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,128
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    158
    Kudos:
    4,512
    Bookmarks:
    338
    Hits:
    27,831

    31 Aug 2026

  3. Public Bookmark *

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    Shane Hollander-Rozanov ✅ @shanehollander 8:56 a.m. [Paris]
    🙂
    I have been asked many times what it’s like being married to Ilya Rozanov. I’ll give you all a snippet of the texts he sends me.

    OR

    Shane's flight from Paris is delayed, and he's hungry, tired, and missing his husband. He decides to give the world an idea of what it's like to be married to the #1 chaos gremlin of the league through Ilya's no-context texts.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,860
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    195
    Kudos:
    10,735
    Bookmarks:
    1,369
    Hits:
    58,783

    31 Aug 2026

  4. Public Bookmark *

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    In Hockey, when a fight breaks out, all other players pair off with a player on the opposite team to prevent anybody else from entering the fight. It's a form of self policing to prevent a 2 on 1. Players guard their man to stop unfair play.

    Or

    Shane Hollander and Ilya Rozanov always pair off during fights. It's apparently a tradition, and the fans can't get enough of it.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    9,751
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    189
    Kudos:
    5,627
    Bookmarks:
    1,240
    Hits:
    33,432

    31 Aug 2026

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    Bood: Good morning team! Is everyone alive?
    Dykstra: define alive

    OR

    A look into the Ottawa Centaur's team chat the day after winning the MLH cup.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,374
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    306
    Kudos:
    11,506
    Bookmarks:
    1,486
    Hits:
    80,141

    29 Aug 2026

  6. Public Bookmark *

    Words:
    6,165
    Works:
    5
    Bookmarks:
    728

    28 Aug 2026

  7. Public Bookmark *

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    Shane: I need your help and I need it now.
    Shane: I’m sure you’ve all seen the video.
    Shane: I need you to bury it.

    After the fanmail video leak lands at the worst possible time, Shane has to gather his allies and turn to social media to try to change the story.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    7,220
    Chapters:
    4/4
    Comments:
    332
    Kudos:
    4,185
    Bookmarks:
    899
    Hits:
    25,547

    24 Aug 2026

  8. Public Bookmark *

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    Hayden watches Shane, almost expecting him to go, "wow, I was hacked while we were at practice, look at these weird messages!". But no such luck. Shane smiles.

    A real smile, a big one, his text from Lily smile. God, Hayden was so sure they were sending each other endless strings of heart emojis and "I miss you more" "no, I miss you more"s, not…that. Never in a million years would he have guessed that.

    Or: 5 times someone's shocked to learn that Shane's a little freaky, +1 time someone isn't

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,913
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    1,067
    Kudos:
    31,680
    Bookmarks:
    5,359
    Hits:
    215,868

    12 Aug 2026

  9. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    Bood:
    Have you looked through our schedule yet?

    Rozanov:
    Shane is dissecting it now
    I know better than to interrupt calendar time
    Or I won’t get my reward

    Bood:
    Not touching that
    Look at our first road day off

    Rozanov:
    Are we going to be stuck in Winnipeg for three days again?
    I will sue

    Hollander:
    Oh God

    Rozanov:
    What???

    Bood:
    We have a day and a half off in Las Vegas
    On Halloween
    Y’all are sorting out the bail funds right? With all that endorsement money

    Hollander:
    Maybe it won’t be that bad?
    Our guys party a lot less than the rest of the league

    Rozanov:
    You have met Bergy and Young, yes?

    Bood:
    Don’t forget Pointy
    And Dillon
    Honestly Haasy could be a wild card too
    Rozanov:
    Do not worry Shane
    Will be good practice for having kids, yes?
    Drunk hockey players are just large toddlers

    Hollander:
    It’s going to be a nightmare

    Bood:
    Lmao yep we’re so cooked 😂

    ______

    OR

    The Centaurs have a night off in Las Vegas on Halloween. It goes about as well as one would expect. Told through group chats and social media posts

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,032
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    44
    Kudos:
    2,166
    Bookmarks:
    266
    Hits:
    12,166

    10 Aug 2026

  10. Public Bookmark *

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    “My boyfriend thinks I’m an idiot,” Ilya says. "Well, not really but a bit, maybe.”

    “Your boyfriend?” Sandra, the queer studies professor sits down, hard.

    “Yes, he thinks it is not smart to say faggot in the locker room when you are locked in the closet and Russia has the keys.”

    Ilya had been talking about himself when he’d said it. Making a joke. Sailing a little close to the wind, sick of listening to the background hum of homophobic bullshit. But someone had been filming. The video went viral. The Raiders panicked under the terrible PR. Now he was here.

    Sent to Queer Studies 101 to appease twitter. Because he’d been cancelled. For being a homophobe. If was fucking ridiculous.

    He turns to the professor. “So, can you help me take on Putin and NHL at same time or I need more advanced class for this?”

    Plus Chapter 2 – Social media chapter. Once they've been outed, Ilya gets to demand an apology from twitter.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,579
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Comments:
    377
    Kudos:
    10,988
    Bookmarks:
    1,866
    Hits:
    64,409

    10 Aug 2026

  11. Public Bookmark *

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    It starts, like any good small talk does, about the weather.

    Jane. I am dying.

    Shane is still in bed, spending his last hour before practice clicking endlessly through YouTube when he gets the notification. With no one there to see, he lets the smile settle comfortably as it spreads, and switches apps. He’s about to shoot down Ilya’s latest attempt at desperate seduction when another text arrives.

    I will play next game with no feet because cold took them.

    This... was new.

    Shane expects texts from Ilya to bring him to his knees. They do, but in another way instead.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,728
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    302
    Kudos:
    11,975
    Bookmarks:
    1,994
    Hits:
    58,466

    12 Jul 2026

  12. Public Bookmark 56

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    Hockey boyfriends Ilya Rozanov and Shane Hollander attempt to buy and decorate a Christmas tree… with predictably chaotic results. Between Ilya’s questionable taste, Shane’s exasperation, and more kisses than strictly necessary, the holiday season turns into their sweetest, messiest adventure yet.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    6,614
    Chapters:
    4/4
    Comments:
    11
    Kudos:
    246
    Bookmarks:
    56
    Hits:
    2,968

    10 Jul 2026

  13. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    CENTAURS GROUP CHAT

    [July 26th, 2:49 AM]

    Young:
    [Image Description - Young, LaPointe, and Holmberg posing together shirtless. All 3 have brand new large Centaurs tattoos on their ribs. They are clearly hammered in the picture]
    TATTTTTEEEEDDDDDD

    LaPointe:
    yu are my brothrrs for liiiiifeeefe allll of u shud be heeereeee

    Holmberg:
    YESSSSSS WE MISS YOU
    Get your asses to Mexicooooooo rn
    ‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️

    Young:
    CENS CENS CENS CENS CENS

    _____________________________________

    OR

    It's the Summer of 2022, and the Ottawa Centaurs have just won their first ever Stanley Cup. Shane and Ilya may be having a perfectly boring summer at the Cottage, but parenting their rookies via group chat is keeping them on their toes.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,784
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    83
    Kudos:
    3,429
    Bookmarks:
    490
    Hits:
    17,030

    06 Jul 2026

  14. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    5 Times Shane Hollander outed himself as a freak + 1 time Ilya Rozanov outed Shane Hollander for being a freak

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,656
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    13
    Comments:
    551
    Kudos:
    22,459
    Bookmarks:
    2,746
    Hits:
    155,494

    04 Jul 2026

  15. Public Bookmark *

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    Hayden Pike’s worst nightmare has come true: only Ilya Rozanov can soothe little Arthur - who knows Russian, apparently.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,134
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    3
    Comments:
    101
    Kudos:
    2,031
    Bookmarks:
    340
    Hits:
    12,663

    26 May 2026

  16. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    He sends Shane a link for an article about the Puppy Bowl. 

    Ilya [19:34] Shane Hollander. Did you know this exists? 

    Shane [19:46] No? Why would I have heard of this?

    Ilya [19:46] God, you are such a disappointment 

    Ilya [19:47] I love you. 

    Ilya [19:47] Whatever plans you have Sunday, they are cancelled. 

    Shane [19:53] I’m so confused. 

    Shane [19:53] I love you, too.

    Ilya [19:55] 😘😘😘🐶🐶🐶🐶🐶🐕🦮🐩🐕‍🦺🐕‍🐾🦴🐶

    ___

    Or, Ilya learns about the Puppy Bowl.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,115
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    151
    Kudos:
    5,702
    Bookmarks:
    763
    Hits:
    32,224

    26 May 2026

  17. Public Bookmark *

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    Shane Hollander is too much of a nosy bitch to go years with a Russian situationship and not learn a little Russian. And I think the post-tuna melt conversation would have gone quite differently if he had.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    13,291
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    70
    Kudos:
    1,667
    Bookmarks:
    363
    Hits:
    9,438

    23 May 2026

  18. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    Shane Hollander seems to get a new tattoo of a flower or leaf every time something significant happens to him. Ilya's curiosity threatens to drive him mad.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,983
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    199
    Kudos:
    4,943
    Bookmarks:
    1,029
    Hits:
    26,449

    22 May 2026

  19. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    And there it was, clear as day. Ilya shoving his tongue into Shane’s mouth in the reflection of a background of a fucking Hayden Pike fan video.

    Shane was going to talk to the team about it that first practice after. But then management had pulled him into a meeting and from the game that night. He’d spent hours defending himself and his integrity as player, as a captain, and as a person.

    or

    How the Montreal Metros get over themselves, and start backing their captain.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    6,165
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    68
    Kudos:
    1,703
    Bookmarks:
    355
    Hits:
    9,133

    17 May 2026

  20. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    “It is the worst day of my life,” Ilya declares, throwing himself dramatically onto one of the kitchen stools. “I went to go get lunch at Russian place I like, the one with lamb pelmeni? They had sign on the door. They are closing. Forever.”

    -

    Or: Ilya’s favorite Russian restaurant in Ottawa is going out of business. There is only one thing Shane “Mr. Real Estate” Hollander can do.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,728
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    464
    Kudos:
    17,640
    Bookmarks:
    3,222
    Hits:
    93,879

    11 May 2026

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