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  1. Public Bookmark *

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    Sveta
    Help me
    I am in love with a virgin

    Ilya was exaggerating for comic effect, of course. He wasn’t in love with Shane Hollander. He was just absolutely infatuated with him and wanted to carry him around in his pocket and also fuck him senseless and then count his freckles while he slept beside him. So not love, just whatever that was, but still. It was a problem.

    Or,
    A newly-drafted Ilya Rozanov finds himself transfixed by a beautiful man in the grocery store.

    Newly-single college student Shane Hollander does something uncharacteristically brave.

    Neither of them are prepared for just how out of their depth they're about to be.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    69,772
    Chapters:
    20/20
    Collections:
    3
    Comments:
    4,727
    Kudos:
    8,448
    Bookmarks:
    2,521
    Hits:
    183,002

    27 Sep 2026

  2. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    “You are in bathroom now having panic attack, calling your boyfriend because you just told journalist you are gay?”
    “Fuck you, Ilya,” Shane scoffed.
    “I am just making sure I understand the situation. Okay, okay, you just go out and say you misspoke. You meant to say that you are… gray.”
    “I’m not a fucking paint sample.”
    “Maybe you said that you pray?”
    “I definitely did not say I pray. Also, I’m not religious.”
    “You're not?”
    “Ilya, can you fucking focus?”

    ****
    When Yuna books Shane a sit-down interview with GQ, she has no idea she's about to derail the carefully laid ten-year plan Shane and his secret boyfriend had only just begun to build. Shane never realized how exhausting the secret had become until it slipped out. Suddenly, telling the truth felt just a little more bearable than forcing himself back into hiding.

    This is a story about bravery. About being scared and doing it anyway. About being too exhausted to keep lying. About deciding which truths are finally safe to share, and which must still be protected while real danger remains.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    45,960
    Chapters:
    29/29
    Collections:
    3
    Comments:
    969
    Kudos:
    2,991
    Bookmarks:
    816
    Hits:
    68,364

    27 Sep 2026

  3. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    Shane enacts some revenge on Scott Hunter by making him spend time with Ilya unexpectedly.
    ~
    “Hey Hollander, glad you could make it! And… Rozanov?” Hunter flung open the door moments after Shane knocked, and seemed to be performing some kind of system reboot in his head.

    “Yes! Hello Hunter, I have been told polite thing to do is to thank you for the invite,” Ilya stated, not offering anything further.
    ~
    “When you mentioned someone else tagging along, I wasn’t expecting fucking Rozanov!”

    “Oh, yeah, well he was also in town and I thought it would be fun, you know?”

    “You thought it would be fun? To willingly spend more time with Rozanov?”

    ~All works in the series, while within the same universe, can be understood and enjoyed as standalone fics!~

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,106
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    56
    Kudos:
    1,790
    Bookmarks:
    123
    Hits:
    14,038

    27 Sep 2026

  4. Public Bookmark 68

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    Summary

    The Montreal Metros team earned the kind of petty punishment only Shane Hollander could dish out, and he planned something special for them.

     

    “Do you think that was a glitch or something?” Hayden wondered out loud.

    “Don’t know man,” Shane offered.

    “Annoying as shit, if it was,” Miitka scoffed, taking a swig of his beer.

    “I’ll tell you what,” Drapeau started. “If I never hear fucking “Hey Jude” again it’ll be too soon! Paul McCartney is now personally on my shit list.”

    ~All works in the series, while within the same universe, can be understood and enjoyed as standalone fics!~

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,040
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    37
    Kudos:
    1,029
    Bookmarks:
    68
    Hits:
    6,388

    27 Sep 2026

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    Ilya thinks he’s funny, making fun of Shane in front of some of the Centaurs. Little does he know Shane is hilarious.

     

    “What the fuck are you doing?” Harris swatted at Luca’s back. “Everyone knows you don’t announce your presence like that! Have you ever seen a scary movie?”

    “Chill, he’s not old enough to get into those movies by himself,” Troy snarked back, though Shane noted his voice also now held a twinge of fear in it.

    “I’m going to get murdered by ghost and you idiots will be the ones I spend my last moments with,” Ilya groaned.

    ~All works in the series, while within the same universe, can be understood and enjoyed as standalone fics!~

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,088
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    74
    Kudos:
    2,119
    Bookmarks:
    154
    Hits:
    16,773

    26 Sep 2026

  6. Public Bookmark 90

    Tags
    Summary

    It turned out purposefully annoying his boyfriend could be fun. And "Shayden" was a delightful way to do that.

    Ilya: Why show me?
    Hayden: Because Friendship Rozanov
    Shane: Yeah, Friendship Rozanov
    Ilya: You encourage this?!
    Shane: Saw this and thought of you Hayd!
    Sometimes when I’m sad I think about Shayden. Then I’m not sad anymore. Highly recommend

    ~All works in the series, while within the same universe, can be understood and enjoyed as standalone fics!~

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,179
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    70
    Kudos:
    2,171
    Bookmarks:
    90
    Hits:
    16,214

    26 Sep 2026

  7. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    Shane comes out to Hayden, doesn’t tell him about Ilya, says he has a crush on Ilya and forces Hayden to be wingman. Ilya thinks this is hilarious. Hayden is suffering, but still determined to be a good friend.

    Shane: So I’ve been thinking about how we can get back to full trust right?
    Hayden: Yeah! Of course, whatever you need man
    Hayden: I am here for you my friend
    Shane: I need you to help introduce me to Rozanov
    Hayden: What
    Hayden: No no no no no no
    Shane: Come on Hayd! You’ve always been so eager to try and wingman for me in the past, you can’t let me down now
    Hayden: The past attempts didn’t involve Rozanov

    ~All works in the series, while within the same universe, can be understood and enjoyed as standalone fics!~

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,963
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    117
    Kudos:
    2,725
    Bookmarks:
    182
    Hits:
    18,383

    26 Sep 2026

  8. Public Bookmark 35

    Tags
    Summary

    Cliff Marlow and Hayden Pike are at a bar, attending the last minute bachelor party of either of their best friends, Shane and Ilya.

    They make awkward conversation, reminiscing on the “heterosexual” lives of their close friends, before they got together.

    They dwell on the girls that each of them were sure their teammate would marry someday:
    Jane and Lily.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,412
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    11
    Kudos:
    415
    Bookmarks:
    35
    Hits:
    2,963

    26 Sep 2026

  9. Public Bookmark 91

    Tags
    Summary

    Harris: SHANE HOLLANDER!!!!

    Shane: Oh no.

    Shane: I’m getting some serious déjà vu right now.

    Shane: Are you pranking me again?

    Shane: You know pranks don’t work that way. You can’t prank me with the same prank again.

    Harris: No I am not pranking you again.

    Harris: But I am five seconds away from driving to yours and strangling you because WHY IS YOUR HOLE TRENDING ON TWITTER?????

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,554
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    29
    Kudos:
    1,190
    Bookmarks:
    91
    Hits:
    14,685

    26 Sep 2026

  10. Public Bookmark 65

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    Summary

    Hollzy: Good morning rookies!!!

    Hollzy: Rise and shine! Come on, up, up, up!

    Hollzy: Daniel Young!

    Hollzy: Nicolas LaPointe!

    Hollzy: Alexander Holmberg!

    Hollzy: Wake up!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Hollzy: Luca, you can stay sleeping 😊

    Hollzy: Since you have spectacular grammar and punctuation and are only in here because you felt left out.

    Hollzy: The rest of you need to remember that I know where you live and will show up there if you don’t wake up right this second!

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    9,409
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Comments:
    18
    Kudos:
    729
    Bookmarks:
    65
    Hits:
    10,299

    26 Sep 2026

  11. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    Ilya: THEY ARE SHIPPING ME WITH PIKE??????

    Ilya: PIKE???? THE 15TH BEST PLAYER IN M*NTREAL??????

    Harris: Who taught you the word shipping?

    Shane: Harris please, he’s been screaming for the past 15 minutes.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,345
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    57
    Kudos:
    1,874
    Bookmarks:
    142
    Hits:
    16,896

    26 Sep 2026

  12. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    Troy: Okay don’t judge, this started as a surprise for Harris okay 😭

    Troy: So I entered Chiron in a puppy pageant right and the progress was being followed on Twitter.

    Troy: There’s this account for it wait.

    Troy: @OttawaPuppyPageant

    Troy: Anyway, there’s also a group chat for all the participants and it’s nice and stuff, except I kinda of got into it with some of the dog mum’s a few days ago.

    Troy: And now #ChironIsCancelled is trending 😭

    Ilya: WHAT???

    Ilya: HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO CHIRON?

    Ilya: YOU ARE A BAD BOYFRIEND AND A BAD FATHER!!!!

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,836
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    66
    Kudos:
    1,627
    Bookmarks:
    111
    Hits:
    12,726

    26 Sep 2026

  13. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    “You are such an idiot!” Ilya cackled loudly, pointing a finger at Troy Barrett.

    “Idiot with a capital I,” Shane added, nodding his head solemnly.

    “Idiot with all the letters capital! Barrett, I cannot believe you!”

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    6,687
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    105
    Kudos:
    3,278
    Bookmarks:
    369
    Hits:
    34,830

    26 Sep 2026

  14. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    matty @hollanderssock: oh to be a montreal fan in the stands in 2010 making eye contact with THIS shane hollander and capturing his baby gay heart before i*ya r*zanov had the chance to sink his claws in

    [photo: Shane on the bench in a Montréal jersey during the 10/11 NHL season, filtered so that his cheeks are more visibly freckled]

    posted 24-Nov-2023 17:51

    |

    Ilya Rozanov ✅ @rozanov81 replied to @hollanderssock: 😂😂 Thank you for the funny tweet Mr ‘Hollander's Sock’ but my claws were already in

    |

    Ellie 🏒🌈 @hollanovgirlie24 replied to @rozanov81: sorry WHAT 

     

    or; 2023 is perhaps the best year of Ilya Rozanov's life so far (as told through the contents of his phone)

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,308
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    89
    Kudos:
    6,372
    Bookmarks:
    592
    Hits:
    38,061

    26 Sep 2026

  15. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    Ilya strides in with the largest, most obnoxiously sappy grin Troy has ever seen on him. Hollander is following a few steps behind him.
    “Everyone! Meet my fiancé. His name is Shane, you´ve probably never heard of him before.”
    “Asshole.”
    “Who, me?” Roz asks innocently.
    “Nah, what do you mean? I´m talking to that other guy I´m engaged to.”
    “So does that mean we´re breaking the no threesome rule?” Ilya is bouncing on his heels happily. Wow, that derailed quickly.

    OR: Ilya and Shane show up to Bood´s barbecue as a couple and learn how freeing being out can be (including, of course, a very nosy but supportive Centaurs team)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    7,288
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    25
    Kudos:
    1,376
    Bookmarks:
    151
    Hits:
    12,639

    26 Sep 2026

  16. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    Shane goes down. Hard.
    Hayden doesn’t even hesitate. He immediately throws his gloves down and goes after Marlow, yelling at him over the sound of the panic. By the time he’s pulled off, he realizes Shane still isn’t alert. The medics are carefully getting him onto a backboard.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,094
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    34
    Kudos:
    2,734
    Bookmarks:
    269
    Hits:
    19,645

    26 Sep 2026

  17. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    Shane yanks his arms from Ilya’s grip. “Sorry about the cheap shot, Rozanov. He’ll be dealt with.” He’s still furious, his hands shaking by his sides.
    “Is okay, Hollander, don’t punch your own team for me. You’re not a fighter.”
    “I am when I have to be.”

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,782
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    67
    Kudos:
    5,315
    Bookmarks:
    692
    Hits:
    53,223

    26 Sep 2026

  18. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    Shane blinks slowly as his phone starts dinging. OTTAWAGS: The Better Halves ❤️ stares at him from the top of his screen.
    Hi Jane! This is Cassie Boodram. Hope it’s okay that Ilya gave us your number. He talks about you all the time and we wanted you to feel welcome with us. We know your relationship is private and we will fully respect it- we just want you to have a group you can talk to whenever you need! Feel free to mute the chat if we ever get to be too much.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    7,129
    Chapters:
    3/3
    Comments:
    134
    Kudos:
    5,026
    Bookmarks:
    594
    Hits:
    45,241

    26 Sep 2026

  19. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    “Dude, you have scratches covering your back,” he says. “Literally scabbed over, which means they must’ve bled at some point.”
    “Ah. I please my lover.” Ilya shrugs and pulls his t-shirt on. “Sorry if you don’t know the feeling.”

    or
    five times their teams find out they're freaks + one time they find out that they're freaks together

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,851
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    157
    Kudos:
    11,910
    Bookmarks:
    1,707
    Hits:
    88,966

    26 Sep 2026

  20. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    Hayden frowns when he finally checks his phone after lunch. There’s a missed call from Shane, along with a six minute long voicemail. He steps to the side to listen. Within seconds, he feels nauseous.
    “Hayd? Everything okay?” JJ frowns, getting Jackie’s attention, too. “You look like you’re about to throw up.”
    “I think Shane is in trouble.” He starts the voicemail over and puts it on speaker.
    A huff. “Ilya, I said no.”
    “Mhmm, you don’t get to say no, not to me.” A thud. “I can do what I want, remember?”
    “No! I don’t want it! I’m already so sore-”
    A slap. “Fine then. Get on your knees, you fucking slut.”

    Or

    Hayden finds out in an absolutely awful way

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,919
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    27
    Kudos:
    1,341
    Bookmarks:
    145
    Hits:
    14,310

    26 Sep 2026

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