Helyna
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Summary
“Bob-Bob, we have a problem.”
Robert adjusted his reading glasses on the bridge of his nose, and clicked immediately through to the 1-to-1 window on his Dispatch screen, ready and on hand. “I’m on deck. What’s happening, Bae?”
“Well, there’s really no easy way to say this, but… I’m irresistible.”
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In combat, Flambae gets hit by a spell that makes everyone fall in love with him. Luckily, one specific person seems to be immune.
Series
- Part 3 of fuck it! dispatch fic collection
Bookmarked by Helyna
24 Sep 2026
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Summary
“We think it’s a Soulmate Eater,” Blazer explained to him, the moment he sat down.
“I'm sorry… a what-the-fuck-now?”
“Yeah, that was me, about five days ago,” she sighed, rubbing her shoulder unconsciously, where Robert assumed her mark must be, underneath the purple sweater she was wearing. “But... they’re a thing, apparently! There’s been twelve of them, in recorded supervillain history."
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A new supervillain is terrorising the city, draining people's soulmate connections and leaving them catatonic, in order to fuel some kind of unknown plot.
But that's totally ok, because Robert Robertson doesn't actually have a soulmate... or so he thinks.
Series
- Part 2 of fuck it! dispatch fic collection
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 67,547
- Chapters:
- 6/6
- Comments:
- 394
- Kudos:
- 1,065
- Bookmarks:
- 235
- Hits:
- 13,838
Bookmarked by Helyna
24 Sep 2026
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Harry Potter and the Unsolicited Mate Bond by Hocus_pocus
Fandoms: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling, Twilight Series - Stephenie Meyer
09 Oct 2025
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Summary
After Prom, as Bella chooses to stay with Edward inspite of the warning sent through Jacob, Billy Black grows increasingly concerned, writes a letter to a wizard he met once in the '70s—a bloke named Sirius Black with a motorcycle, a bad attitude, and a theory about ancient family magic. He wasn't sure he would even get a reply. Especially not from a magical, immortal, emotionally unavailable godson.
When the letter meant for Sirius ends up at the dusty doorstep of Grimmauld Place, Harry—traumatized, retired, and very much done with wizard drama—decides to answer . He heads to Forks, Washington to do a favour for Sirius's long lost relative: keep an eye on some girl dating a vampire.
What he doesn’t expect is for one dangerously intense vampire named Jasper Hale to takes one look at Harry and short-circuit.
Congrats, Harry. You’ve just been mate-bonded to a vampire. Damn his Potter luck.
Series
- Part 1 of Till Death Do Us Part
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 146,710
- Chapters:
- 19/19
- Collections:
- 8
- Comments:
- 1,189
- Kudos:
- 6,080
- Bookmarks:
- 2,010
- Hits:
- 177,172
Bookmarked by Helyna
13 Sep 2026
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Summary
To call Robert's new situation with Flambae ‘complicated’ would be a drastic understatement.
Robert cut his fucking fingers off. Flambae tried to burn him to death after a bar fight. They aren’t good for each other, barely even like each other, and there’s no way it’s going to end well.
But when the sex is this fucking good, Robert is having trouble listening to the logic.
Or, the one where they become fuckbuddies and catch feelings.
(Everyone pretend to be shocked.)
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 39,830
- Chapters:
- 9/9
- Comments:
- 367
- Kudos:
- 2,606
- Bookmarks:
- 695
- Hits:
- 34,367
Bookmarked by Helyna
11 Sep 2026
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Summary
Flambae’s been acting up more than usual. He keeps blaming it on his lack of dates, and Robert’s not impressed.
(Or; The Dispatcher's Guide To Getting Your Subordinate to Do His Fucking Job Properly, Volume II: BDSM Edition. Preface: SDN cannot be held responsible for the complicated feelings that may arise from this new, unethical dynamic you have created with your hot coworker. Please note that the HR department works on a Schrödinger's Cat basis and may come into play at any moment. Let SDN be your rock, and good luck!)
Bookmarked by Helyna
10 Sep 2026