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Summary
Instead of going directly to hell when he died (do not pass GO, do not collect $200), Vincent Whittman’s soul ended up tethered to the TV set that killed him. Fortunately, one of his surviving followers stole the TV from the scene of the accident, saving him from an eternity of being stuck in either a landfill or a museum’s storage room. Unfortunately, the Perez family moved to a suburb of Miami and placed Vincent's TV reverently in the guest bedroom, where it was promptly forgotten for the next twenty years.
Meanwhile, Valentino Perez is sleeping his way through Florida’s finest. A cast of lively characters parades (and gasps, and moans, and tops, and bottoms) its way through the bedroom (and living room, and kitchen, and back porch, and, well, you get the idea) of the otherwise-empty house…or so Valentino thinks.
Vincent watches Valentino dig his own grave…and then, too soon, fall into it. What new horrors—fire, brimstone, homosexual tendencies (oh my!)—will await them when they finally end up in Hell, where they belong?
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Summary
Alastor's got a routine. A ritual, if you will. The ritual is both enjoyable and necessary—some might say he relies on it for a modicum of peace and joy in his mostly excruciatingly boring existence. One must find a way to keep entertained in the face of eternity, after all.
Everything is disrupted when Adam and his Exorcists attack the hotel, including Alastor's routine. This is unacceptable. However, Alastor can't figure out how to fix it, and finds himself growing more irritable about it by the day.
When Lucifer finally notices the traces of grace on Alastor and drags him up to his room to inspect them, things can only end well. Surely nothing will awaken in either of them!
Or, Alastor is rather an expert in DIY top surgery, Lucifer is fascinated by the complexities of the Sinner psyche, and you should try absolutely none of this at home.
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Plan A: Tell everyone Alastor tops. Plan B: ...whatever this is. by PuffinStack for MothballMilkshake
Fandoms: Hazbin Hotel (Cartoon)
15 Feb 2026
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"He could claim it was all a joke, an error, a misunderstanding—but in Hell, no one cared about correcting misinformation. No matter what, this story was out, and it would spread fast, considering the reach of Alastor’s broadcast and the fact that Vox listened to it obsessively. There was nothing he could do.
Lucifer wished his magic could turn back time. Could take the words 'Come on down to bed, Al,' out of everyone’s minds and pull the sound back through the radio waves into his big, stupid mouth."
Or, all of Hell heard Lucifer call Alastor down to bed. What's a devil to do to fix his mistake? Well, apparently...whatever this is. (Alastor vetoed Plan A.)
[Written for MothballMilkshake's 500 Mothballs WTIYS! Congratulations, Moth!!]
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Velvette is tired of getting the cold shoulder from Vox. He's clearly still seething about the fact that she and Val risked their afterlives to save him, and he's not going to make the first move to fix their relationship, stubborn old asshole that he is. Velvette misses him, much as she loathes to admit it, so she makes him an offer.
Things turn out...differently than she expected.
or, Vox promises to take Velvette apart, then does exactly that. She enjoys it more than she thought she would.
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"Apply pressure to control bleeding." by caelustar, PuffinStack
Fandoms: Hazbin Hotel (Cartoon)
05 Jan 2026
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Summary
Alastor and Lucifer are each having the worst months in their recent memory. Vox is tormenting them both in unique and special ways, and they won’t survive unscathed. However, there might be a silver lining. Can they maybe, just maybe, bond over their experiences? Can they come out of this closer than ever? Will first aid be enough to keep them standing?
There’s only one way to find out.
(with not one, but two pieces of art by the incredibly talented caelustar!)
[Written for Egg-plosion 2025!]

