SecondhandDemon
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This work is for my spouse, who has lovingly put up with me now for thirteen years.
I have a bad habit of writing my own poems in cards for birthdays and holidays. However, once I'd written this poem I knew that it didn't belong in a card.
It had to be posted here, for posterity.
If you're reading this and are NOT my spouse, I should probably apologize but really you're the one reading this, so you only have yourself to blame.
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Prompt: Introducing the new Defense Against the Dark Arts Professor ...
"Politeness carried the professors through the first week of classes. Pride carried them through the second: they would not capitulate to their curiosity and pepper the man with a thousand questions. They were better than their students, they vowed.
There was nothing left to carry them through the third week, however; their tongues were raw from biting and their curiosity not the least abated."
Recent bookmarks
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Liminal Space by Calamityjim
Fandoms: Young Justice (Cartoon), Red Robin (Comics), Batman - All Media Types
09 Jul 2019
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Bruce's habit of collecting strays is not limited by dimension.
Or
When Young Justice Batman comes across an angsty, seemingly abandoned by his Batman Tim Drake, he decides to step up to the plate and parent the crap out of him.
podfic available: https://archiveofourown.org/works/43438116
Series
- Part 1 of Liminal Spaces
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 77,156
- Chapters:
- 17/17
- Collections:
- 165
- Comments:
- 4,990
- Kudos:
- 31,926
- Bookmarks:
- 7,637
- Hits:
- 681,534
Bookmarked by SecondhandDemon
10 Sep 2026
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No More Dead Robins by Bjurnberg
Fandoms: Batman - All Media Types, Justice League - All Media Types
19 Feb 2022
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Red Hood saves Robin from a death far too like his own. And keeps him. No take backs, Batman.
Series
- Part 1 of No More Dead Robins
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 38,842
- Chapters:
- 20/20
- Collections:
- 3
- Comments:
- 863
- Kudos:
- 3,285
- Bookmarks:
- 702
- Hits:
- 58,475
Bookmarked by SecondhandDemon
10 Sep 2026
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someday i hope you learn to take your own advice by unfortunate_songbird
Fandoms: Batman - All Media Types
22 Mar 2022
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Jason's doing okay.
He's started teaming up with the Bats for patrols, and there's some hesitant trust forming.
It's really more than he could hope for, after all the bridges he burnt.But when he's faced with a past version of himself, he knows he can't let him make the same mistakes he made.
He's determined to fix the past, but he might just change his future along the way.Series
- Part 1 of bird's dc fics
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 8,833
- Chapters:
- 2/2
- Collections:
- 6
- Comments:
- 48
- Kudos:
- 1,156
- Bookmarks:
- 230
- Hits:
- 8,468
Bookmarked by SecondhandDemon
10 Sep 2026
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in the shadows by Kieron_ODuibhir
Fandoms: Batman - All Media Types, Batman (Comics), Justice League - All Media Types, DCU
24 Apr 2022
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“You’ve visited that kid every day for weeks,” Clark said. “Why?”
Batman stared at him. “How long have you known?”
“Batman…”
“You’re confronting me now because you’re worried about my intentions toward Dick. He changed your mind about something. Ergo, you’ve been sitting on this for a while. How long have you known I wasn’t real?”
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 12,290
- Chapters:
- 4/4
- Collections:
- 19
- Comments:
- 499
- Kudos:
- 6,827
- Bookmarks:
- 2,160
- Hits:
- 51,440
Bookmarked by SecondhandDemon
10 Sep 2026
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the co-parenting quandry by queerenteen
Fandoms: Batman - All Media Types, Batman (Comics), Catwoman (Comics)
25 Jul 2022
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"Co-parenting is a thing, you know that right?"
Bruce and Selina blink like they did not know that.
That does not bode very well.
What is even worse is the grin that overtakes Selina's face.
"Bruce?" she says and he cocks his head to the side. "You thinkin' what I'm thinking?"
"We should get married?" tries Bruce with all the elegance of someone who keeps mixing up social cues.
Jason almost facepalms but then sees how Selina's smile widens even further.
"Oh no," he manages to think. "This is not good."Batman and Catwoman find a tiny child trying to steal the Batmobile tires. The resulting custody battle involves breaking into each other's houses and stealing said child in the middle of the night.
It works until it doesn't.
Or: Batman and Catwoman's marriage of convenience for co-parenting purposes.- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 5,698
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 6
- Comments:
- 74
- Kudos:
- 2,824
- Bookmarks:
- 718
- Hits:
- 18,362
Bookmarked by SecondhandDemon
10 Sep 2026