deconstructedhart
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Summary
Chris's high school has an "anything but a backpack" day. Chris understands the assignment perfectly. Chris brings Theo. It's not his fault the four-year-old asked permission via dinosaur roars.
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Eddie marveled at the stone sculptures. Did they desire to live beyond museum walls that were full of crown molding and marbled floors? Or were they content, being captured and immortalized forever in a lover's embrace? He pondered those two questions as Buck stood beside him. Facing the sculpture of two lovers, Buck tilted his head slightly down in Eddie's direction and bumped his shoulder against him.
"You're just like 'em you know."
Fear seized in Eddie's chest as his eyes flickered up to meet his gaze.
With the ghost of a smile on reddened lips - from drinking berry hibiscus tea - Buck continued by saying, "You're softness made of stone."
Then with a reverent observation that sounded like a prayer he added, "And just as beautiful."
OR:
Eddie finds out he can’t outrun his past, but damn does he try. He has to try even harder, when a childhood friend comes to LA bringing with him memories Eddie swore he’d forget.
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“I'm gay.”
He's looking at his feet, because he hasn't quite come to terms with the fact that he's saying this in a room where other people, strangers, can hear it.
But this is still the first time he's said it this way: out loud, in a declarative sentence. Being nervous is fine. Frank said that being nervous is fine, and Buck just said he's proud, and the only thought Eddie has in his head is that it's embarrassing he can't raise his head and say it like a man, so clearly, he's going to need to hang on to other people's words for the time being, someone who isn't his dad trying to explain the ways Eddie's allowed to inhabit the world.
He doesn't need to ask anyone's permission to be who he is. That's also a thing Frank said.
in which eddie attends a self-empowerment group for gbtq men to supplement his therapy, and is empowered to: forgive himself, say "i'm gay" to his own reflection in the mirror, accidentally adopt an adult, make fried rice, and tell his straight best friend that he's in love with him. not necessarily in that order.
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Eddie accidentally overhears Buck jerking off in the firehouse showers. Neither can act even slightly normal about it.
(Set before 8x06)
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“Eddie, you’re scaring me,” Buck says in the quiet of the room. “Do you-- do you know what day it is?”
“Friday,” Eddie answers, tongue thick like his throat is stuffed with cotton.
“Yeah,” Buck confirms. “And-- do you know my full name?”
Eddie swallows. “Evan Buckley,” he says definitively, but--
He finally turns to look at Buck’s face, and it’s like he’s waiting for Eddie to keep going. Like Eddie had gotten it wrong. Buck’s face melts, his brows pinched together, and Eddie--
He doesn’t know what the hell is going on.
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Eddie loves every version of Buck. And Buck? Well, he’s starting to realize every version of Buck loves him right back. If only Eddie could get back home to tell him that.