desert_cryptid
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"The medbay logs every unit of gauze that gets used, Jason. Alfred's already running twenty-hour days... I didn't want to throw off his inventory over something non-critical."
"Non-critical." Jason's hands stilled for a second over the wound, and when he spoke again his voice had gone very quiet. "You don't have a spleen. You know what an infection does to somebody without one? It doesn't send a memo first."
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Timothy Drake is a very low-maintenance child. He has an algorithm for living in Wayne Manor without leaving a footprint: you stay on the uncompromised joists of the floorboards, you fold your suit away instead of creating laundry, and you never, ever ask for help you haven't explicitly earned.
It's a perfect system. Right up until Cassandra Cain notices a fleck of dried harbor mud on the servants' stairs, and Jason Todd realizes exactly what kind of quiet the replacement is keeping.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 13,958
- Chapters:
- 6/6
- Comments:
- 181
- Kudos:
- 1,175
- Bookmarks:
- 203
- Hits:
- 15,273
Bookmarked by desert_cryptid
05 Aug 2026
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Batman, go grab your Robin... Wait, wrong Robin! by IzzyMRDB
Fandoms: Batman - All Media Types, Batman (Comics)
11 Aug 2022
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Summary
Tim just wanted to go trick-or-treating as Robin this year. He had been working so hard on his costume and it looked so authentic, he really just wanted it to be appreciated.
How did he end up being kidnapped by Batman?
AKA
A sleep-deprived and lightly concussed Bruce grabs the wrong Robin when heading home from Halloween Patrol.
Series
- Part 27 of My slowly growing collection of One-shots
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 1,627
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 70
- Comments:
- 471
- Kudos:
- 25,529
- Bookmarks:
- 4,802
- Hits:
- 139,274
Bookmarked by desert_cryptid
15 May 2026
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Upon seeing the Joker trying to hold a four year old hostage in Gotham Mall, Bruce does the logical thing. Which is to beat the shit out of him.
In public, out of costume.
Gotham reacts.
Series
- Part 1 of In which there is Social Media
- Part 7 of fueled by coffee, spite and kirby music
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 3,982
- Chapters:
- 2/2
- Collections:
- 48
- Comments:
- 533
- Kudos:
- 18,262
- Bookmarks:
- 3,010
- Hits:
- 113,163
Bookmarked by desert_cryptid
02 Apr 2026
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Summary
One night, Robin spots a kid with an overnight bag on a rooftop, and he jumps to the obvious conclusion: the kid's trying to run away. The kid is doing a really bad job of it, though, and that's the sort of thing Robin just has to correct.
Except the kid is Tim Drake, and Tim isn't actually trying to run away. But "running away" does sound a little better than "stalking bat-themed vigilantes through the crime-infested streets of Gotham every night." So he lets Robin have this one.
Besides, that's the end of it, right? Robin might have found Tim once, but no one ever looks for Tim a second time. Robin can think whatever he wants. They'll never see each other again.
(They see each other again.)
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 11,522
- Chapters:
- 2/2
- Collections:
- 61
- Comments:
- 541
- Kudos:
- 19,848
- Bookmarks:
- 4,320
- Hits:
- 145,288
Bookmarked by desert_cryptid
20 Mar 2026
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Street Smarts by Sohotthateveryonedied
Fandoms: Batman - All Media Types, Batman (Comics), Nightwing (Comics), Robin (Comics)
18 Jan 2026
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Summary
Officer Dick Grayson is selected at the last minute to give the students of Gotham Academy their annual Stranger Danger presentation.
Bookmarked by desert_cryptid
20 Mar 2026
Bookmarker's Notes
I was in tears. This is the funniest thing I’ve read in a long time. 10/10