dragonsbecute
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The Merc with a Beak by Jenetica
Fandoms: Spider-Man - All Media Types, Deadpool - All Media Types
04 Aug 2026
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Summary
Wade Wilson is the best merc in the business, and he knows it. When he crosses the wrong kind of withered old lady—the magic kind—she curses him to regret his cockiness in the most literal way possible: By turning him into a cock. A rooster. A male hen, of the chicken variety.
Peter Parker, grieving the loss of Aunt May and Uncle Ben, needs a change. That's what his grief counselor says, anyway. So he makes an impulsive and massive one: He buys a farm. He doesn't mean for it to turn in a rescue for broken things, he just... he can't help but love the animals that no one else wants. Thus, when he overhears a greasy, crude asshole trying to pawn off a rooster in the middle of a farmer's market, he doesn't hesitate.
But there's something wrong with this rooster. It doesn't crow at sunrise—which is the only thing Peter expects a rooster would do—but it does holler its tail off whenever Peter bends over. And it follows him around and clucks like it's talking to him. And it's weirdly good at killing the vermin around the house.
There's a mystery afoot. Peter's going to get to the bottom of it.
(The Beauty and the Beast!AU you never knew you needed.)
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By Any Other Name (I Will Always Feel the Same) by isthatbloodonhisshirt (wasterella) for pandane
Fandoms: Teen Wolf (TV)
25 Sep 2020
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Stiles very slowly reached up with both hands and covered his neck as best he could before whispering, “Are you Vampires?”
“What? No.” Derek couldn’t help the small laugh of disbelief that slid up his throat, crossing his arms defensively over his chest. It didn’t matter that he was thousands of years old, or that he was bigger and stronger than Stiles was. Somehow, he was pretty sure once this conversation was over, Stiles was going to be able to crush him like a bug, and he hated that feeling.
“Didn’t you say he was smart?” Boyd asked.
“Hey,” Stiles insisted, turning to him with a glare but not removing his hands from his neck. “Vampires is a perfectly logical guess in this case. And he said I was right on the Supernatural front. Vampires are Supernatural.”
“He said you weren’t wrong,” Boyd corrected. “Not that you were right.”
“Well, the opposite of wrong is right, so...” Stiles gave him a look, but turned back to Derek relatively quickly, as if realizing he was delaying his own answers.
“We’re not Vampires,” Derek said, then let out a small sigh before admitting, “we’re immortal.”
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Or: The Old Guard AU nobody asked for (except me).
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It’s A-Boat Time! by Fae_vorite, isthatbloodonhisshirt (wasterella)
Fandoms: Teen Wolf (TV)
06 May 2022
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He could hear the others talking outside, Scott and Isaac freaking out over something and Stiles snapping at them to shut up and help him get inside.
“Dude, how the fuck can you expect me to stay calm right now! Seriously, that’s a fucking tail!”
“We can talk about it later, just get me inside before someone fucking sees me! I don’t want to end up in a fucking aquarium!”
“Christ, you’re heavy!” Isaac grunted. “How much does this thing weigh?!”
“Shut up and walk,” Stiles snapped.
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Bookmarked by dragonsbecute
26 May 2026
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the fortress round my heart by drunktuesdays for shiningartifact
Fandoms: Teen Wolf (TV)
17 Sep 2013
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Summary
Cora wants to go on a road trip. “Fuck this place,” she says vehemently. “Fuck this toxic hellhole cesspit.”
Derek has nothing left, can’t disagree with her, so they go.
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Stiles is Alpha bait.
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Bookmarked by dragonsbecute
19 May 2026