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  1. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    Shane is a sex worker who reviews his clients on a website called Oh No, Shane Fucking Writes

    At Ilya’s office, everybody knows OhNSFW. It’s practically a mandatory morning read.

    What they don’t know is that Ilya booked a session with Shane about three weeks ago. Tonight, he finally gets to meet him in person.

    And he can hardly fucking wait to read his review.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    17,113
    Chapters:
    4/8
    Comments:
    258
    Kudos:
    633
    Bookmarks:
    251
    Hits:
    6,973

    11 Sep 2026

  2. Public Bookmark *

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    "Papa! Coach Shane! Papa, look, I gave Coach Shane Baba's ring, and now it means you can be happy and married and we can--"

    "Wait, I didn't say yes! I told you, Masha, I can't say yes." Shane jumped in to intervene before this could go any further.

    "But you took the ring!" Masha argued back, incredibly reasonably.

    Ilya, still blank-faced, took a long moment to look between his daughter, Shane, and the ring in Shane's hand, evaluating the arguments he was presented with.

    "Well, she is right. You did take the ring." Ilya answered, straight-faced and logical, like this wasn't a ridiculous argument to be entertaining, let alone playing along with.

    Youth hockey coach Shane Hollander faces a proposal from a 7-year-old, asking him to please marry her papa.
    Her papa, Ilya Rozanov, commits to the bit.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    27,553
    Chapters:
    8/11
    Comments:
    104
    Kudos:
    548
    Bookmarks:
    182
    Hits:
    10,056

    11 Sep 2026

  3. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    Despite the *obvious* interest on both their parts (standing naked under a shower makes it hard to hide certain feelings) Shane Hollander and Ilya Rozanov don’t hook up after the CCM shoot. A few years later, when they’re both Captains of their respective teams, Ilya comes out as bisexual. Shane immediately makes his move to lock down the boy he’s had a crush on all this time, before it’s too late. After a surprise at a post-game press conference and a challenge from the Raiders, Shane has to convince Ilya he is serious about having a real relationship in front of professional hockey and the entire internet. Will it work? There’s only one way to find out!

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    23,659
    Chapters:
    5/5
    Comments:
    399
    Kudos:
    3,113
    Bookmarks:
    810
    Hits:
    26,569

    11 Sep 2026

  4. Public Bookmark 81

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    Summary

    Ilya tells him that a lot of the other things people or reporters ask are social media things from ‘chronically online’ people. Though he doesn't know what half of it means either, which makes Shane feel better. Shane is the opposite of chronically online. Chronically offline. Farah runs his official twitter which he never, ever logs into. He tried once, saw a hockey take that enraged him so much that he logged out and told Farah to change the password and never tell him. Then he had an hour-long date with his punching bag. Farah mostly runs his official instagram too, but he does occasionally log in himself to post pictures of him and Ilya now that he can do that. He’ll scroll through and like the backlog of all his friends' posts and then log out for another month. He never watches any of the reels that the rookies send him. Shane will die before he gets TikTok.

     

    Shane, Ilya, Scott and Troy are all invited to give an interview on their experiences as queer men in hockey. This is obviously Shane's favourite use of his time.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    9,023
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Comments:
    88
    Kudos:
    590
    Bookmarks:
    81
    Hits:
    4,590

    09 Sep 2026

  5. Public Bookmark 36

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    Summary

    Shane has a migraine after a hook up; Ilya takes care of him.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,016
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    16
    Kudos:
    412
    Bookmarks:
    36
    Hits:
    4,414

    09 Sep 2026

  6. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    Shane and Ilya have a lot of sex. A lot of hot, intimate, dirty sex. But sometimes they don't. Sometimes, for one reason or another, they find more intimacy in the unexpected moments where their plans to fuck don't work out.

    Or:

    Shane and Ilya taking care of each other.

    • • •

    I: Shane Hollander has too much to drink.
    II: Ilya Rozanov gets the fucking flu.
    III: Shane Hollander suffers an Autistic shutdown.
    IV: Ilya Rozanov misses his mother.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    24,140
    Chapters:
    4/4
    Comments:
    550
    Kudos:
    8,366
    Bookmarks:
    2,015
    Hits:
    102,421

    09 Sep 2026

  7. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    "What's it... Holl... Shane... Moya lyubov... It's Buddy. The basketball dog. The stray dog that plays basketball. It's the best movie ever." - Ilya's cheeks are blushed like he can't believe Shane never watched the movie before.

    "A dog that plays basketball. How is that even possible?" Shane asks confused eyes darting from the tv back to Ilya, genuinely asking.

    Ilya sighs.

    "Oh my god, stop talking right now and watch before I break up with you."

    "Over a dog? Ilya," Shane giggles, the corners of his eyes doing that little scrunch whenever he laughs. Ilya can't help but smile back.

    ***
    Or: Shane has the flu, Ilya goes to Montreal after his game in Ottawa to take care of his boy ❤️ quick one shot, fluffy domestic Hollanov.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,400
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    23
    Kudos:
    897
    Bookmarks:
    119
    Hits:
    10,233

    08 Sep 2026

  8. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    Shane and Ilya catch the flu. David and Yuna catch Shane and Ilya.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    7,282
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    294
    Kudos:
    3,953
    Bookmarks:
    538
    Hits:
    23,780

    08 Sep 2026

  9. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    Centaur media day has the team competing in a “don’t laugh” challenge, where Captain Ilya Rozanov is the unbreakable final boss no one can crack. Until Lucas Haas recruits the one man who can do it - his husband.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,047
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    114
    Kudos:
    4,275
    Bookmarks:
    546
    Hits:
    21,226

    06 Sep 2026

  10. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    Hollander gestures to where they’re sitting and asks, “This okay?”
    Rozanov yells, once more, “Puppies!”

    --
    OR: The Stanley Cup Champion Ottawa Centaurs Do Buzzfeed's Puppy Interview

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,574
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    803
    Kudos:
    20,513
    Bookmarks:
    3,325
    Hits:
    134,700

    06 Sep 2026

  11. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    The man doesn’t look phased. On the contrary, he’s acting like it’s completely normal to talk about sex with a stranger.

    “Well, my wife wants me to…” David hesitates, but what damage could it do? Tomorrow, he’ll be on a plane back to Ottawa and he’ll never see this man again. “She wants me to try being more dominant.”

    The Russian grins. “Oh, you have met the right person.”

    Or: In 2014, David and Ilya become friends and start swapping sex advice. It's too bad they don't recognize each other.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    13,371
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    1,089
    Kudos:
    12,777
    Bookmarks:
    2,365
    Hits:
    72,659

    05 Sep 2026

  12. Public Bookmark *

    Words:
    23,836
    Works:
    3
    Bookmarks:
    134

    05 Sep 2026

  13. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    “So we thought it’d be cute if we did your legal name.”

    The realization hits Shane only a split second before Harris lifts a Jersey. Same ugly Centaurs Pride Logo, Same 24, same A.

    HOLLANDER-ROZANOV is blazoned across the back, squeezed in to fit the 20 inches allotment.

    Shane and Ilya have their first Centaurs Pride Night as a married couple. They're definitely not weird about it. (Bood disagrees)

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    11,395
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    211
    Kudos:
    3,830
    Bookmarks:
    565
    Hits:
    34,678

    05 Sep 2026

  14. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    It’s like they think that Ilya's someone to put up with, rather than someone that Shane wants to spend every waking minute of his life with. Someone that is, in every single fucking way, Shane’s person. Someone that knows exactly how to make him laugh and someone he doesn’t have to hide his quirks from and someone who allows his own asshole side to shine when Shane wants it to.

    Shane loves Ilya, is in love with him. It’s just that Ilya is also his best friend.

    Or, 5 times that Shane gets annoyed by people thinking he's supposed to control Ilya, and 1 time he finally says something about it.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    11,482
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    757
    Kudos:
    10,112
    Bookmarks:
    2,089
    Hits:
    88,928

    03 Sep 2026

  15. Public Bookmark 86

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    Summary

    Hi Yvette, my name is Lily. I’d like to dedicate a song to Jane, who I was really hoping to see tonight and couldn’t because of the weather. Could you play “Airplanes” by B.o.B. and Hayley Williams for Jane? Thank you so much!

    Or, Yvette LeClaire has been Radio Kingston's overnight DJ since 2001. She's offered empathy and human connection to listeners between 12 and 5 AM ever since. In 2011, she starts getting requests from "Lily" and "Jane," who use her show to send messages to each other when they can't be together.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    19,428
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    2
    Comments:
    72
    Kudos:
    378
    Bookmarks:
    86
    Hits:
    2,788

    02 Sep 2026

  16. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    It doesn’t take Ilya long; he was worked up already. And the knowledge that this is the bot that so often bested him on the ice, about whom a commentator once said “matches Rozanov in everything and beats him with the cool head advantage,” makes everything hotter. His supplication for Ilya. Taking orders. Ilya always thought sex with a robot would feel like that in a cold, abject way. He likes push and pull with girls especially, he likes when they obviously want it. But the bot – Shane – does suck dick like he wants it; like he needs it, really.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    31,862
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Comments:
    193
    Kudos:
    1,023
    Bookmarks:
    386
    Hits:
    12,809

    02 Sep 2026

  17. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    Ilya wishes he knew what he's doing wrong, for everyone in his life to decide Shane is someone to be worried for just because he is dating Ilya. It's even worse that the decision never seems to take more than ten minutes of knowing him.

    Is it just written on his forehead? Careful, this man ruins everything he touches, keep away from precious people.

    Or; Ilya heavily misunderstands who Shane's loved ones are worried for in their relationship.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,643
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    381
    Kudos:
    10,331
    Bookmarks:
    1,671
    Hits:
    97,954

    02 Sep 2026

  18. Public Bookmark 19

    Tags
    Summary

    "You just need to be careful! You don't know who's watching and going to use something against you and you're on a contract year!"

    "Mon ami, you know I love you and your business sense but I really don't think my Snap score is going to impact any decision making versus, like, my TOI."

    ***
    Shane and JJ have a productive conversation about Snapchat etiquette.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    856
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    9
    Kudos:
    414
    Bookmarks:
    19
    Hits:
    2,565

    01 Sep 2026

  19. Public Bookmark 63

    Tags
    Summary

    Ilya Rozanov goes on a podcast and calls Ottawa boring for the 42nd time. Ottawa’s Night Mayor takes it personally, again. One cancelled ceasefire and several litres of Canada Dry used in a thirst trap later, experiencing how one drag queen who is an honorary woman in STEM can make anything enjoyable...Especially Shane's.

    Or: "Fuck, marry, kill: Scott Hunter, Hayden Pike, Zane Boodram." It only gets messier, stickier and gayer from there.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    9,018
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    48
    Kudos:
    460
    Bookmarks:
    63
    Hits:
    5,356

    01 Sep 2026

  20. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    There really was no way he would have been able to break up with Shane tonight. He is a weak, weak man. He is a weak man who needs to get the fuck out of here before he goes back on Twitter and causes problems, or before he does something else insane like sniffing through Shane’s underwear drawer or running a reverent hand across his yoga mat. All around him is Shane Shane Shane and Shane is not here. Shane is at Montreal General Hospital in unknown condition, possibly alone.

    Ilya is putting his shoes on before he fully realizes that he’s decided to go to the hospital.

     

    Shane Hollander is carted off the ice after getting hit by Cliff Marlow. An exhausted and still-grieving Ilya Rozanov spirals, makes some stupid choices, and accidentally finds himself hanging out with his situationship’s parents.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    41,054
    Chapters:
    3/3
    Comments:
    895
    Kudos:
    7,087
    Bookmarks:
    2,043
    Hits:
    77,193

    01 Sep 2026

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