wtchpnk



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  1. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    from: [email protected]
    to: [email protected]
    subject: Re: what the heck spell check

    Coach Lasso,

    I can assure you that my transfer has nothing to do with your club's relegation, nor is there anything that Richmond has done in error. Rather, I have spoken with my editors and we’ve agreed that this is the most appropriate course of action.

    I wish you all the best in the season.
     
    -Trent Crimm
    +44 3032 723956
    [email protected]
    The Independent
    Northcliffe House
    2 Derry St
    London
    W8 5TT
    UK


    Language:
    English
    Words:
    85,558
    Chapters:
    7/7
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    152,610

    03 Oct 2026

    Bookmarker's Notes

    Ctrl+F "a little less phallic" and laugh your ass off

  2. Public Bookmark *

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    In 2003, Shane Hollander is assigned a PenPal, and gains a friend. A friend who smokes, calls him boring, and gives him ridiculous nicknames.

    Across the world, Ilya Rozanov practices his English with a curious Canadian boy whose name he can't fucking remember.

    Or, before they were Canada's Shane Hollander and Russia's Ilya Rozanov, they were Cat and Elijah. Shane has no reason to suspect his childhood PenPal is his hockey rival, and Ilya has never even considered that the man he's falling for is also the boy he already fell in love with through letters and postcards.

    Language:
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    Words:
    273,466
    Chapters:
    38/?
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    2
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    13,396
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    04 Sep 2026

  3. Public Bookmark *

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    Maybe Shane Hollander is boring, but he likes boring. And Scott Hunter is also kinda boring so Shane should like him, too. Right?

    Or, Shane hooks up with Scott because that's totally a better option than his fucking rival and he definitely doesn't think about Ilya the whole time...

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    18,218
    Chapters:
    6/8
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    271
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    2,032
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    636
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    32,059

    19 Aug 2026

    Bookmarker's Tags:
  4. Public Bookmark *

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    russianstallion messages hollabackgirl on Grindr for some fun, but then they keep showing up at the same places, conveniently right when Boston and Montreal have a game against each other.

    ---
    Shane and Ilya, unbeknownst to each other, are sexting on Grindr while still being rivals on the ice.

    *SMAU that was previously uploaded to twitter is now on ao3 for ease of reading*

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    10,249
    Chapters:
    1/1
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    5,847
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    245,913

    18 Aug 2026

    Bookmarker's Notes

    "I love you and more" 😭😭😭

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    Post-breakup, Shane discovers three terrible things:

    1. Ilya has a type.
    2. The type is apparently tall, dark-haired men built from the Shane Hollander starter pack.
    3. Not one of them has the decency to have freckles.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    27,163
    Chapters:
    3/3
    Comments:
    165
    Kudos:
    1,776
    Bookmarks:
    400
    Hits:
    29,298

    17 Aug 2026