Chapter Text
Alone. He was all alone in this place. He has been alone ever since he could remember.
Family? What was a family? He saw a few group of people together in this slum who call themselves each other’s family, but for him who has never had anyone in his life— he didn’t understand what a family is. From what he observed, it was probably a group of people who had close bonds with each other… but he didn’t have anything like that, so he doubted he would understand any time soon.
Home? Even in this slums, he didn’t have a place to call ‘home’. He didn’t even have a place where he could permanently live. Every single night, he wandered to find a shelter to sleep in; never in the same place. Home was a strange concept for him.
He yearned for both— ever since he could remember, he has yearned for both. As he tried to sleep in the cold, dead night of Suribachi, he’d dream of a warm place to sleep in and of faceless people who’d take him in and love him and would give him home. Every. Single. Night.
He knew, how hopeless and useless it was to dream of such a thing in this kind of cruel world, but he still couldn’t help himself. That was all that he would think about as he curled into himself beside a dumpster in some trashy alleyway, trying to gather what little warmth he could get to survive yet another night.
A family, a home…
One day, maybe he would get them both.
One day.
He ran as fast as he could, not letting his opponents take away their key to victory. He was so close, just a little bit more, and… yes, this was it. With one strong kick, he threw a powerful kick and— “GOAL! Nakahara-kun scores a goal, which brings Yokohama High to their victory! With this, Yokohama High will proceed to the finals!”
Nakahara Chuuya grinned to himself as he wiped away the sweats that are starting to roll down his face. He did it, he brought his soccer team to victory and to the finals! Those long weeks of rigorous training and going back home late finally paid off.
His blue eyes glanced at his teammates who were cheering among themselves, high-fiving and hugging each other. His gaze moved towards their coach, who gave him a proud thumbs up. Finally, he rested his eyes upon his parents, who were clapping excitedly and looking at him proudly. The grin on Chuuya’s lips stretched into a full blown smile. He was so happy that he could make everyone he cared about happy and proud with what was the result of his hard work.
An arm slung around his shoulder, pulling him close. It was Asahi, one of Chuuya’s teammates. “Hey, Chuuya! Thanks for the goal, man! You’re the real MVP today!” He cheered, as he dragged the red head to the rest of their teammates. “With this, we’re in the finals! One step closer to victory!”
“We should celebrate this!” Another of his teammates, Hideki, suggested. “How about going to the arcades? It’ll be so fun! I heard the Arcade near the Kaede Cafe has a new game installed! A fighting game! Come on, come on~!!!”
“Whoa, Hideki, you’re really excitable today.” Masao teased, poking Hideki’s cheek. “You’re acting like we’re still five years old.” Ah, that was right, Masao and Hideki are childhood friends, weren’t they? Masao would know how Hideki acted when he was still five.
Shin interrupted before the infamous squabble between Masao and Hideki could go on even further. “Going to the arcade sounds like a good idea though. What do you think, Chuuya?” And with that, all the team’s attention was directed at the red head.
Chuuya blinked in surprise at the question. Usually, they never really ask him about his opinion, and he usually just follow them once they decided to do something. Being asked about his opinion though… it did feel nice. “I’ll go inform my parents, and then we can go.”
“Gotcha! I need to tell my parents too, anyways! Come on! Let’s get going and then we can go have fun!”
An arcade wasn’t something that he has visited often, even with his teammates. More often than not, when his teammates come here, Chuuya either chose to go home or say that he had something else to do. It didn’t have anything to do with his teammates, it was just that… he didn’t really like arcade for a reason that even he didn’t know. The only few times he actually went here with them, they were because he couldn’t find any reason not to. Even then, he wouldn’t play any of the games and just watch his teammates (usually Masao and Hideki) play.
Today though, he decided to give it an exception.
“Ha! I win again!” Chuuya cheered, pumping his right fist in the air while Asahi despaired at his third lost. The game they were playing sas a fighting game. Chuuya has never played this kind of game before, but apparently, in Shin’s words, he was a natural. The game wasn’t that hard, Chuuya thought, but fast reflex and quick thinking were definitely needed to win this game. “Are you serious when you say no one has ever won against you, Asahi?” He teased.
Asahi grumbled. “Not even Masao or Hideki has won against me in fighting games! Aaaah! You’re just-- just-- I don’t know! Maybe you’re really a natural like Shin says, gah!” He was flailing his arms in the air as he said all that. “Ah, let’s play another game! Hm… the zombie shooting one! I’m way better at shooting games than fighting games. I’ll win that one for sure!”
Chuuya shrugged. He didn’t know how well he'd do with shooting games, but it did sound fun.
It turned out that Chuuya was as much as a natural in shooting games as he was in fighting games. Once he knew how the game worked, it was like he was a different person in a different place. Chuuya’s eyes were always good and sharp, it was easy for him to pinpoint the enemies coming at him and Asahi. Surprisingly, he was also quite the sharpshooter. By the end of the level, once the game showed the result of their first mission, it said that Chuuya had a pretty high accuracy. around 87%.
“Are you sure this is really your first time playing a shooting game? Because wow, dude, that accuracy!” Masao whistled at the numbers displayed. “And also your kills… that’s a lot for a first timer.”
Chuuya turned to look at his kill count. Huh, ‘40 kills’— that’s a lot for level 1. Did he really kill that many zombies? It was surprising.
His gaze lingered on the fake gun on his hand, ignoring the cord connecting the gun to the game machine. His hand wrapped around the grip easily, though he wouldn’t say that it felt natural like his friends have been making it out to be. It was still weird, holding a gun, especially for the first time.
… Ah, he was probably just overthinking stuff. It was not good to overthink them.
So, he turned to Asahi once again. “Want to play another round?”
“You bet.”
By the time they finished playing, the sun has already set outside and the sky was darkening, and the scent of the sea stronger. Yet, the streets of Yokohama were still full of people wandering around, either together with their family, friends or lovers, or alone. The street lights illuminated the city prettily. Chuuya wouldn’t ever stop admiring the beauty of this port city. Ever since he was younger, he has always loved this city.
He walked slower than he usually would, not in a rush to get home. Hands in the pockets of his jeans. He didn’t know why, but taking walks like this around the city always made him a little bit happier than before. Perhaps, it was the atmosphere of the city itself.
It was so different…
He didn’t know how far he’s been walking, or how far, until he’s reached Tsurumi river. The sun was barely visible from behind the horizon at this point. The colour of the sky was now a dark blue-purple, orange barely painting the sky anymore what with the sun sinking down.
The Tsurumi river was, surprisingly, void of people at the moment. Oh, people still passed by, sure, but no one was just… there to enjoy the view. Chuuya loved seeing the sunset from here, so he thought it was a shame that there weren’t more people who thought the same as he did. On the other hand, the peace and quiet in this place was soothing too, especially at a windy evening like this one.
Chuuya closed his eyes, taking a deep breath. As always, the scent of sea salt in the air was strong in Yokohama, but it was a familiar and comforting scent, in his opinion. It smelt familiar. It smelt like home.
Slowly, the redhead opened his eyes once more, blue orbs wandering to the nearest bridge. He expected to see no one on the bridge, or even if there was someone, it’d just be a passerby. He definitely did not expect to see this .
He didn’t expect to see a boy just his age, standing on the edge of the bridge. It was obvious what the boy was going to do from how it looked like. The fall wouldn’t kill the brunet in an instant, but he doubted the boy went here to die from a fall. No, he was probably trying to drown himself.
If there was anything that Chuuya hated, it was people who gave up in life so easily. Life was full of wonders, and it shouldn’t be wasted just like what that boy was going to do. Hell if Chuuya would just stand back and do nothing to stop the boy. Chuuya was not going to let anyone die within his sight, not if Chuuya could help it! Especially not from suicide .
With a speed achieved from rigorous soccer training, Chuuya moved from his idle spot, and dived directly towards he river just as the boy let himself fall down. Chuuya has always been a good swimmer too, so it didn’t take long for Chuuya to reach the boy just as the body hit the water. Dragging the boy out of the body of water was easy— the boy’s clothes made it a little harder, but Chuuya was strong enough to get him out of the river. It was not like the river’s stream is that strong to hinder him.
Upon reaching the riverside, throwing the boy to the ground first before he climbed up, Chuuya grumbled. He took off his green jacket, twisting and stretching and squeezing the fabric to squeeze out the water. Fuck, if his mother saw him coming home with wet clothes, he was going to get scolded real good. At least he had a good reason for jumping into a river. His parents would probably understand.
“Failed again…” The voice was small and almost inaudible, but in a quiet place like this where there were only two of them, Chuuya easily heard it. Turning around, he saw that the boy was already sitting up, looking down onto his two hands. Bangs covered his eyes, so Chuuya couldn’t exactly see his eyes.
There was something peculiar about the way the brunet dressed though; particularly the bandages that wrapped around the boy’s arms and neck. Was the boy in an accident recently? Maybe he injured himself so bad that he couldn’t do something he loved anymore, and that caused him to be suicidal and thus, well, attempted what he did? There were so many possibilities, and Chuuya was just not that good at guessing games.
With both his hands posed on his hips in annoyance, Chuuya called out to the boy. “Hey, you! What the hell are you thinking, you idiot? Jumping down a bridge like that…!”
It was a miniscule movement, but Chuuya could have sworn that the boy tensed up a bit before he immediately relaxes. The boy lifted his head and turned to look at Chuuya. Now Chuuya could see that the bandages didn’t only wrap the boy’s neck and arms, but also his right eye. The eye that was visible though--
Dark brown, almost red in this lighting-- yet it looked so haunted and empty and dead. It was both mesmerizing and terrifying. What has this boy gone through to have such a look in his eyes? He was only, what, seventeen just like Chuuya? Chuuya was not unaware that there were seventeen years old who had really bad life, but… just how bad of a life did this boy went through?
“You’re…”
“Chuuya. Nakahara Chuuya.” Chuuya approached the boy, standing right in front of the still seated brunet. The brunet was looking at him with an unreadable expression, with a gaze so deep as if he was seeing through Chuuya’s whole life. Chuuya shifted on his spot, trying to look annoyed and confident at the same time even under such an unnerving gaze. “I saved your ass. Who’re you?”
(It was annoying how despite Chuuya was the one who was standing up, and the brunet was the one sitting down, it was as if Chuuya was looking up to him and the boy was looking down on him. Chuuya hated being stared down.)
“I never asked to be saved. It’d be better if I die.” The brunet finally decided to stand up, and oh fuck , he was taller than Chuuya by at least a good… ten centimeters, maybe even more. “To think that a chibi like you would be the one to save me…!”
“WHO ARE YOU CALLING CHIBI, YOU BANDAGE WASTING DEVICE?!” Chuuya glared at the taller boy, pointing at him. Only speaking four sentence since Chuuya saved his ass, and the bandage wasting device has already pissed him off. “I’m seventeen! I’m still growing!”
The brunet shrugged, looking away in boredom. “Yeah, I don’t think so. You’ll be stuck as a chibi forever.” He even stuck his tongue out childishly at the end of his mocking just to rile Chuuya up, the brat! “Chuuya will always stay a chibi, I guarantee it!” a mischievous smirk stretched across the boy’s lips. “Aha~! I’ll curse you to stay short forever for saving me! That’ll work~!’
“Haaa?! I saved you and you cursed me?! You ungrateful bastard! Go to hell!” Chuuya gave him the middle finger before turning around, away from the fucking accursed brat. He was going to leave this place, go home, and forget this ever happened! Really, he was. He was going to forget this event and forget the bas—
“Dazai,” the boy interrupted his train of thoughts. Chuuya glanced back with a raised brow, glaring at him questioningly. The boy smiled, “Dazai Osamu. That’s my name.”
For some reason, his smile, though small, looked more genuine, and now that Chuuya took a better look, his eye didn’t seem as lifeless as it had been. He seemed a little more alive than when Chuuya saved him… The look suited him, Chuuya mused.
“Tch, whatever, I hope I don’t see you around anymore, bastard Dazai!” Chuuya waved his hand to bid goodbye as he turned around to leave. “I don’t have enough time or patience to deal with people like you!”
“Mmh, sure! I don’t want to see Chuuya again in the future too! Who’d want to meet with a short tempered shortie like you? Bleh!” He could practically hear Dazai, that bastard, sticking his tongue out again at Chuuya, and it took everything in Chuuya not to turn around and stomp towards Dazai to give him a piece of his mind. “Chibis like you shouldn’t be out after dark like this, you’d never grow any taller!”
“What the fuck does that even mean?! I don’t think it works like that!”
“Keep saying that to yourself, hatrack!”
“I don’t even own a hat!”
“Huh, really? You look like a person who’d collect a lot of tacky hats~!”
“Shut up! I don't collect hats! Even if I do, they aren’t going to be tacky!”
“Sure.” And the way Dazai said it screamed of sarcasm that was grating on Chuuya’s nerves.
“Gah, whatever! Good bye for real!”
“See you around, Chuuya.”
Chuuya didn’t even spare a single glance back at Dazai as he left Tsurumi river, heading right back to his home. He has never met someone as infuriating as Dazai before. He really hoped that he was not going to meet the mackerel anymore. Today was enough. Really enough .
He was going to go home, take a bath, eat dinner, and then sleep. When he wakes up tomorrow, he wouldl return to his daily routine. His life would return to normal without Dazai in it.
Yes, that sounded like a plan.
He would be Nakahara Chuuya, a normal kid who has two parents who loved him very much even though he was not really their son. He would be Nakahara Chuuya, a good student even though he was not on top, academic wise. He would be Nakahara Chuuya, the popular school kid who has a lot of friends. His life would be fine and normal— perfectly fine and normal .
Little did he know, that fated meeting with Dazai Osamu will change his life.
The way Dazai said his name when he bid him farewell though... for some reason, even though it sounded mostly filled with amusement, it was tinged with longing.
And for some reason, sadness filled Chuuya.
He didn’t know how long he has walked, or how far. He didn’t even know where he was, but all he knew was that this place was so different from where he came from. Instead of rundown buildings or tents on dirty streets, there were tall skyscrapers on clean streets. The people here were also cleaner with clothes that were not rugged and stylish— clothes that doesn’t seem to be second hands.
He wandered through the streets, not knowing where to go.
Until he bumped into someone— a woman with red hair and blue eyes. She knelt down, looking at him in concern. “Are you lost, little one? Where are your parents?”
‘Parents’? He didn’t have one. He didn’t have a family. He didn’t know what a family was.
So he just shook his heads in reply.
“Oh... “ the woman looked up at the man who was with her. “Dear, we… you know how we’ve always wanted children, but can’t, right? Can we….?” She sounded so pleading and hopeful as she looked at the man. The man looked hesitant at first, as he threw a glance at him, and then back to the woman. “Please, dear…” the woman once again plead.
The man finally resigned, giving the woman a nod.
The woman smiled and turned back to the kid, offering a hand to him. “We can give you a home, little one. Do you want to?”
Home… it was a strange concept to him, but it sounded tempting. If he follows this woman, he could finally have a home. He would find out what having a home really means.
So he accepted the offered hand. “What’s your name?” He didn’t reply, because he didn’t have a name. The woman seemed to understand that though, for she smiled at him and pulled him into a hug. “Alright then, from now on, your name is Nakahara Chuuya.”