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“The war is almost over,” Cody murmured to himself, absentmindedly. He was standing on the bridge of their flagship, leaving Utapau after the destruction of General Grievous and the victory over the Separatists on the planet. It wasn’t a particularly long battle, as his Jedi general had dispatched Grievous rather quickly.
“What was that Cody?” His General, Obi-Wan Kenobi, glanced over at him. Cody had forgot how close the Jedi was standing next to him and blinked, quickly gathering his thoughts.
“The War. It’s nearly over, isn’t it? Count Dooku is dead. You just killed Grievous. They were the biggest players.”
“Them and the Sith Lord,” Obi-Wan agreed, looking troubled and relieved at the same time. “With Palpatine gone…” he trailed off, eyes misty and shoulders slumped, as if the fight had gone from him.
“Sir?!”
Obi-Wan straightened and cleared everything from his stance to the gaze in his eyes. “Apologies, Cody,” he hummed and glanced around, fondly. There was little see, aside from the boring walls of the ship, the few officers and clones milling and working around, and the hyperspace lanes racing by through the windows surrounding them. It would be some time before they reached Coruscant and their fleet had just left. “Everything is just…so bright. So much lighter. I wish you could feel it.”
“What do you mean, sir?”
Obi-Wan seemed to struggle with his next words and thought about this for a moment. “Imagine space; there are planets and stars and all the life and people are supposed to be lights in your vision,” he started, carefully, unsure. “It’s not so much seeing it but sort of feeling it. It lights the path. Not physically, but psychically, spiritually. It’s another type of sight.”
“Alright,” Cody replied, following. “All life gives off light for you.”
“In a way,” he admitted. “But then, over the years, the lights of the people start to go out at a rapid rate. War begins and suddenly everything starts to dim. Nothing you do stops it, no matter how many people you try to save, no matter how hard you fight – there is nothing you can do. Until, one day, everything is so murky that you can barely see a thing. The lights are either too dim to see or gone completely. All is cold, dark and oppressing, like a weight that makes it hard to breathe.”
Cody’s stomach dropped. “That sounds terrible, sir.”
Obi-Wan closed his eyes and looked down. “War does a number on Jedi,” he murmured. “We are natural empaths, it is so easy to feel what others are feeling, especially intense emotions. People tend to project.”
“And no one is projecting good emotions when they are in a war,” he surmised.
Obi-Wan nodded again. “Yes.”
“But…it is a little better now? The darkness?”
His general glanced over at him with a small relieved smile, his eyes giving off little wrinkles. “I can sort of show you, if you would like. To feel the light.”
Cody blinked. He wasn’t really expecting that. He mulled this over for a moment. He had to admit, he was curious, on how the Jedi saw things. Many of the Jedi talked about his brothers’ individuality in the Force. “This is something you want to share?”
He nodded once more.
“Yes, I’d like to see it, sir.”
Obi-Wan gently took his hands into his own and instructed Cody to close his eyes. At first, there was nothing; it felt merely as if he were standing on the deck in the dark. It felt a little weird, standing like this with his general. He didn’t think anything was going to happen at first. But then.
Everything burst.
He felt like he was floating with nothing to stand on, but he wasn’t falling. It was comfortable. He could see so much. There were lights flickering all around him, illuminating people and places and everything in between. Some of the most beautiful places and things glowed in a way that made it seem like they were happy and singing. His general was right about one thing; it was more of a feeling than actual sight but still, something like sight as well. It was like he could see through his feelings; everything was clearing up in them. His heart was full and yearning for more at the same time. The slight breeze cradled around him, swaddling him in a bask of faint light. A caress against the hurts inside him. The feeling was indescribable.
There wasn’t much but there was cold and darkness lurking around the edges of his vision, pressing and pressing against the light that was curling around him. He wished he could will it away but every time it tried to get close, the light pulsed and slowly, the darkness retreated – just enough. Cody could still feel it but the light was becoming…more. This was like nothing Cody had ever felt before.
It felt like an eternity and barely a moment at the same time when he came back to his body. He gasped quietly and looked down at his hands. They were shaking faintly, even Obi-Wan’s grasp. He took a few moments to catch up with his breath and realized tears were silently streaking down his face. He looked up at his general. “That was…You see that all the time?”
Obi-Wan simply smiled with a small nod, his eyes projecting so much joy.
“I…I felt the dark lingering in the corners; cold and hopeless and horrible,” Cody admitted quietly, staring at him. “If it felt like that all the time…” he drifted off and ran a hand through his short hair, releasing his hands from Obi-Wan’s grip. “I don’t know how you would still be able to keep standing, much less fighting. But the light…the light was so warm and beautiful.”
Obi-Wan’s eyes sparked with glee and happiness. Cody had never seen such joy on his face before. “It was difficult before; exhausting,” Obi-Wan explained. “There was little that kept the light on enough for us to see and keep warm, aside from faith in the Force. Everything else was so…dark and murky.”
“Aside from that,” he smirked. “But…what did? What helped?” he wondered if he could somehow get whatever it was to burn a little brighter in the Force. He wasn’t sure if it worked like that.
Obi-Wan grinned further. “You.”
“What?”
“You. The troops. The men. The faith and trust and care you have for us. You are so bright in the Force; it was enough to see. To keep warm and keep going. You stood by us during the worst of things, and you cared so much. You have no idea how unique and beautiful you are all in the Force.” Obi-Wan turned to using his hands in gesture for his point.
“What.”
Obi-Wan laughed which garnered some attention from the other officers but they quickly turned back to their jobs. “You aren’t Force-sensitive,” he started. “But everyone has a signature, a feeling, a look of the Force. Everyone is completely unique, no matter the face they wear. You can’t see it, but the Jedi can. Even without all your hairstyles and paint and tattoos, we can tell each of you apart because you are all so unique in everything with the Force. But it wasn’t just your uniqueness, but your light. You care about us so much; it’s so bright, enough to help us see; some relief in the darkness. It’s only one of the many reasons you and your brothers are many of the Jedi’s best friends.”
And honestly, what was he supposed to say to that?