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“According to the test results, you’re pregnant.”
Keigo sat quietly in the doctor’s office as stunned silence washed over him. It was impossible. It had to be a mistake. “Are you sure?” he asked.
The doctor pointed at the charts on the computer monitor. “Both your bloodwork and urinalysis show elevated hormone levels. It also explains the symptoms you said you were experiencing. When was your last heat cycle?”
Keigo had to stop and think hard. So much had happened over the last few months that he hadn’t even considered the possibility. It had been roughly four or five months since his last heat. But that couldn’t be right? That would put him halfway through the pregnancy and he had barely gained any weight. There was a small amount of pudge on his stomach, but he had chalked that up to no longer being active in the field. As the new head of the Hero Public Safety Commission, he spent more time at a desk than anything.
“About four or five months,” he said.
The doctor pursed his lips. “You’ll want to get scheduled with one of our obstetricians as soon as possible. They’ll do testing to determine exactly how far along you are and go over your options.”
“Right,” Keigo said. His head was swimming. He came in expecting to have the flu, not to be told he was pregnant.
“If you’re not too busy, it looks like Doctor Kitamura has an opening for a new patient in an hour.”
Keigo sighed through his teeth. “I’ll take it. I’ll get some lunch in the cafeteria or something while I wait.”
The doctor nodded and grabbed one of the follow-up cards for Keigo to bring to reception and get the appointment scheduled. “Take this.” He handed Keigo the card.
“Thanks,” said Keigo.
“And Hawks—”
“Yeah?”
“Congratulations.” The doctor smiled at him.
Keigo gave a clipped, “Thanks,” in return, before exiting the exam room.
He lifted his hand to the bite mark on the back of his neck as he walked out into the hallway to head to reception. His fingertip padded over each toothy scar. There was a cut through the middle of it, a physical reminder of his broken bond. He had been careless. Falling for the mark was at the top of the ‘what not to do when you are a spy’ list. Falling for the mark and letting them mark you was even worse. He had broken so many rules. He hadn’t intended to do a honeypot, he hadn’t been asked to do a honeypot, but he was struggling to make a meaningful connection with Dabi and one thing led to another.
Shit.
This was the worst possible outcome; mostly, because his heart ached. His bond may have been broken, but Keigo could still feel the lingering wisps of a connection. Dabi rightfully broke their bond when Keigo killed Jin. Dabi burned Keigo’s wings and cut the back of his neck with one of his own feathers. Divine retribution. He deserved it. The gods were surely laughing down on him.
Keigo handed the receptionist the follow-up card. She scheduled the appointment with the OB and said a nurse would call for him in an hour. He made his way to the cafeteria, to find something to eat. There were some familiar faces there, both as patients and visitors. Keigo sat alone at a small table, needing space to process the news.
The last time they were intimate together was stupidly after they tried to kill one another. They both had been high on emotions when Keigo was released from the hospital, and it had been more of a hate-fuck than anything. He should have done the right thing and incapacitated Dabi and called the police to arrest him. Keigo didn’t have the heart to do it. He had felt so guilty about killing Jin that he had let Dabi take out his aggression on him, slamming him against the wall and fucking him roughly. He could barely speak from the damage to his vocal cords. Keigo had looked at his former alpha with a sad fondness. He had destroyed what they had, while Dabi had continued to give him more and more of himself. Even now, with the war over, Touya was apparently still giving Keigo a piece of himself.
Learning that Dabi was Todoroki Touya had been world shattering. Fighting All for One while he provoked Endeavor about Touya was one of the hardest things Keigo had ever had to do. He had to keep his cool, not let any of them know just how much it ripped his heart out to hear the tragic story of his broken ex-lover.
Keigo struggled to eat his lunch. He didn’t have much of an appetite. He went over the options in his head as he returned to the waiting room for the nurse to call him.
The smartest and easiest choice would be to abort the fetus before it was too late. He was alone in life. His relationship with his mother had gotten better over the last couple of years, but not to the extent that he would rely on her for assistance with a newborn. Financially, he was well off. Having been the number two hero and the Commission’s plaything since he was six left him with a generous sum of money in his bank account. It was all the other stuff that left him wary. Keigo could barely take care of himself. How would he be able to tend to another living being that solely depended on him?
If he kept the child, people would ask questions. Keigo wouldn’t be able to keep the baby a secret forever. They would start to wonder who the father was. Gods, if the child developed a fire or an ice quirk, it would be nearly impossible to hide its lineage—not when he worked so closely with the Todoroki family. He would have to tell them. That was a fucked-up conversation waiting to happen.
The best course of action would probably be to put it up for adoption. Then no one would need to know. He could wash his hands of the situation and never have to explain that he got pregnant with Todoroki Touya, AKA Dabi’s child. His heart squeezed at the thought of someone else raising his child after everything he went through growing up. Maybe this was his chance at redemption for all the wrong he caused in the world?
Keigo’s name was called, and the nurse took him back. They took his height, weight, and vitals over again, despite having just gone through all those two hours prior. She smiled charmingly at him, jotting down her notes for the doctor. She asked him to get undressed and take a seat on the exam bed, handing him a blanket to cover up, then left to call the OB in.
Doctor Kitamura was a mousy heteromorph with a pleasing aura. She did her best to assuage any of Keigo’s fears and gave him a gentle pat on the arm before wheeling out the Doppler machine. It took her a few tries to locate the heartbeat. There was a crease in her brow that left Keigo unsettled. “The heart rate is a little low for this stage of the pregnancy but it’s likely nothing to worry about.”
Keigo listened to the whump, whump, whump of his unborn baby’s heart. He sniffled, overwhelmed by emotions.
“The father?” Doctor Kitamura asked.
“Not in the picture,” Keigo simply said.
Doctor Kitamura nodded in understanding. “Before we proceed, we need to get ultrasound photos so that we can determine how far along you are. You’re going to head down to radiology so one of the radiology techs can do your ultrasound and then we’ll meet back here after.”
“Okay.”
“You can go ahead and get dressed. You’ll go down the hall and take a left. It will be the third door on the right.” Doctor Kitamura held out a hand to help Keigo sit up, then left the room to give him privacy. He could still hear the whump, whump, whump on loop in the back of his head.
The ultrasound was an experience. The technician took dozens of photos and measurements. She said they had to get more than usual since he was so far along. Normally, someone at this stage of the pregnancy would have been in for an ultrasound at least twice.
“Doctor Kitamura will go over the details with you, but judging by the size, you appear to be about 20 weeks along already. We can find out the sex today as well, if you would like.”
Keigo felt dizzy. It was too much information to process all at once. He might pass out. “Do what you need to,” he said. Keigo watched as the large screen on the wall flipped between various sonograms. He could see the little heartbeat of the baby inside him. He could make out the tiny hands and feet. He was going to cry in that dark, cold room in front of a stranger. Keigo sniffled. He was thankful he couldn’t shed tears.
When he returned to exam room 124, Doctor Kitamura arrived moments later. She pulled up the sonograms on her computer and a scowl crossed her face. As she turned to face Keigo, she did her best to school her emotions.
“So, you appear to be twenty weeks and three days, which puts your due date around September seventh. Unfortunately, there appears to be a lot of scar tissue which has compromised your body’s ability to safely deliver the baby. There’s a high chance of miscarriage. If you want to keep the baby, you’ll need to drastically reduce the amount of stress in your life.” She gave him a onceover. “I know that can be incredibly difficult as a hero.”
Keigo forced a tight-lipped smile. “No need to worry on that front. I’m the new president of the HSPC which means I now spend all my time behind a desk.”
Doctor Kitamura nodded. “That’s good then. Maintaining your stress levels and a low activity lifestyle for the next few months will be key. It will be best to plan for a C-Section as well. A natural birth with this kind of damage could be fatal for both of you.”
Keigo didn’t know how to respond to that. He nodded and laughed uncomfortably.
“Do you understand your options?” she asked, visibly concerned.
“Yeah.”
“You have a bit of time to decide what you would like to do, but if you’re wanting an abortion, we’ll need to get that scheduled asap.”
Something possessive took over him at that moment. “No. No abortion.”
“Okay,” Doctor Kitamura said with her hands up, placating. “In that case, would you like to know if it’s a boy or a girl?”
He stared at the images on the screen, golden eyes flicking from sonogram to sonogram. Keigo’s heart clenched as he gave a small, “Yes.”
“Congratulations, Hawks, you are the parent of a little girl.” Doctor Kitamura smiled softly as she pointed at the sonogram on the screen. She tapped the grainy image in the spot where genitals would normally be visible if it was a boy. “I’ll print the photos out for you. You’ll have to start prenatal vitamins right away and I’ll want to see you back here in three weeks. And remember, rest.” She reminded him.
Keigo swallowed hard as he was handed the images of his baby girl.
The elevator ride down to the subfloors of Central Hospital took an eternity. Or at least, it felt that way. Every step out of the elevator towards the room that held Touya felt heavy. Keigo was sinking into the deep, dark depths. The metaphorical shackles around his ankles pulled him back, not wanting to take another step forward. Keigo wanted to give in, but he had not seen Touya since he had been brought to Central Hospital after the war.
He stood outside the door with a heavy weight in his chest. As he lifted his hand to turn the handle, it opened before him. The Todoroki family stepped outside the room—save for Endeavor, who was wheeled out by his wife. Endeavor regarded him curiously.
“Hawks? What are you doing here?”
Keigo swallowed down the lump in his throat and forced a smile. “Commission business. I need to follow up on Dabi’s condition as the new head of the HPSC.”
“They said Touya-nii is only allowed five minutes of visitation because his body is too fragile,” Shouto said in his matter-of-fact tone.
Keigo nodded. “I’ll be brief. Wouldn’t want to cause him any additional stress.” Or myself, he failed to add.
Keigo watched the Todorokis leave before entering the room. He approached the doctor that was inside, asking for a moment alone with Touya. “Two minutes,” he said.
The doctor frowned but conceded. “Two minutes.”
The door opened and closed, then Keigo walked forward.
“What are you doing here, Hawks?” Touya asked from inside his glass coffin. Keigo had been informed right away that Touya didn’t have long to live. The machine he was in would only slow down the process, it wouldn’t heal him. He was too far gone.
Keigo smiled solemnly at him. “Can’t a guy visit his ex for no reason?”
“We both know you’re not here for a casual chat. Get on with it.” What must it feel like for Touya, knowing he’s days, weeks, months (if he’s lucky) from dying. Dabi had been on a suicide mission for so long, but now he wasn’t Dabi anymore. He was a broken man with a broken body. Keigo sighed and reached into his jacket pocket to pull out the sonogram photos. He held it up. Touya squinted. “What is that?” Keigo walked closer, pressing it against the glass for Touya to see more clearly.
“This… this is our daughter.”
“You’re lying,” were the first words out of Touya’s damaged mouth after a moment of silence.
“I wish,” Keigo said, truthfully. “I just found out today. Turns out, I’m already twenty weeks.”
Touya squinted harder, studying the image. It was hard to read his face from how severely damaged it was, but Keigo could have sworn he saw the faintest sign of a smile. “The old man’s gonna lose his fucking mind.”
“That’s not a conversation I’m looking forward to having.”
“Are you going to keep her?”
Keigo nodded. “Yeah. I think I am.” His throat tightened. Keigo forced back the sob that was steadily building. He could break down when he got home. For now, he needed to keep his composure. “I wanted you to know, while there’s still time.”
Tubes and wires shifted slightly as Touya attempted to nod within his life support machine. “Thanks.”
The door to the room opened and the doctor walked back inside. “Time is up.”
“I’ll come back,” Keigo said.
Touya shook his head. “Don’t. Please. I don’t…”
“Okay,” Keigo said softly. He pressed his forehead to the glass. “I did love you. That was never a lie.”
“I know,” Touya said. “Me too, birdy.”
Keigo left.
The next time Keigo saw Touya, he was staring at a picture of him on an altar. Two frames sat side by side. One held the image of Touya the boy, whom everyone had assumed was dead, and another of Touya the man, whom everyone knew was dead.
Keigo sucked in his bottom lip between his teeth as a yawn escaped him. He was so very tired. He hadn’t been able to attend the funeral because he was in the hospital at the time, and now, tending to a newborn as a single parent had drained him of all his energy. The delivery had taxed his body quite thoroughly and he had to remain in the post-partum ward for longer than normal. His pheromones were out of control. His body called for its missing alpha, a deep seeded yearning that Keigo had no way of stopping. The pills didn’t help.
His once barren apartment was now filled with baby items, and yet, it still felt empty. There was a Touya-sized hole in his heart and a broken bond mark on his neck. Dabi never lived with Keigo, and Touya never would.
The baby in his arms began to stir. She cried, as if she too knew something was missing in her life. Keigo held her close, cooing softly at her to calm down. He’d never be able to fill that void for her and he absently wondered if that meant her childhood would be better or worse than his had been, having known his own father until an impressionable age. She didn’t stop crying. Keigo shifted her weight in his arms, holding her close to his chest.
“I can take Natori, if you’d like,” Fuyumi said, coming to Keigo’s side with her arms stretched out. He handed her over with a tired sigh. Fuyumi had been a godsend. Telling the Todoroki family about their new addition was one of the worst missions Keigo ever had to endure, but it was worth it in the end.
“Thanks,” he said. The small weight in his arms disappeared as he watched Fuyumi gently bounce and rock Natori, smiling down on her. Keigo turned away. His heart ached as he looked at the photos of Touya once more. What kind of man would he have grown into if All for One hadn’t intervened in his life? So many lives had been ruined.
Keigo cast a tired glance at Fuyumi and asked, “Would you mind watching her so that I can take a nap?”
“Anything for my niece.” She smiled, whisking Natori away to head into the main part of the Todoroki estate.
Keigo was left alone at the altar. He picked up the photo of Touya as a man and held it between clenched fingers, nails digging into the wood on the back of the frame. His hands trembled and he pressed the cool glass against his forehead, saying a silent prayer for the departed.
I hope your new life is one filled with love and understanding.