Chapter Text
Kanade sighs contentedly from her position on her couch, leaning against Mafuyu while watching Mizuki on the other side of the couch lightly run her fingers through Ena’s hair. These peaceful moments with her recently official girlfriends are her most beloved in her life, and she treasures them dearly. At this moment, she doesn’t even feel the desperate urge to compose. As relaxed as the four of them are, as comfortable as they are around each other, she’s confident there's nothing that can ruin this precious moment.
Until Mafuyu unceremoniously breaks the silence.
“We should have a discussion about sex.”
Three shocked yelps of varying volume respond. Kanade pulls away slightly to better view Mafuyu, while Mizuki and Ena jump apart from each other. A blush quickly fills their faces as they look at Mafuyu, eyes wide - embarrassment, if Kanade is placing her girlfriends’ emotions correctly.
“Why..?” Mizuki awkwardly laughs. Then she narrows her eyes, smiling playfully as her shock wears off into something more teasing. “Wow, Yuki, can’t say you were who I was expecting to get horny. Was Kanade too close for you~”
“I was researching.” Mafuyu ignores her, face characteristically blank despite the subject matter. “The reason most relationships end is due to lack of communication, especially polyamorous ones such as our own. Sexual expectations, boundaries, and other considerations are often under-communicated, especially in relationships involving high schoolers, leading to breakups.”
Mafuyu’s frowns slightly, voice shaky. “I do not want to lose the three of you. So we should communicate.”
That’s- really, really sweet. Kanade smiles warmly as she realises Mafuyu is just doing everything she can, in her own way, to try and keep the best three people to have entered her life together. She moves back to wrap her arms around Mafuyu.
“We’re not going anywhere, Mafuyu.” Kanade reassures. “And, yeah. It’s probably a good idea. We should talk about that soon.”
“R-right.” Ena’s voice agrees. “Uh, how exactly..?”
“Do you want to have sex.” Mafuyu bluntly asks.
“You can’t just ask that!” Ena groans. “...But you’re right about communicating. I should… uhm.” A deep breath.
“... maybe. Yeah.” Ena quietly admits.
“I’m fine either way.” Kanade adds, as she pulls away. “If it’s something any of you want, I think I’d like to?” Truthfully, Kanade hasn’t really thought about it before. But the idea of being able to make her girlfriends happy, like that…
She shakes her head before her mind starts to wander. Instead, she looks towards Mizuki, noticing that she has a distant look in her eyes. Kanade tilts her head in concern.
“Mizuki? What about you?”
Mizuki jumps, quickly schooling her expression into a playful smile, although not fast enough to fool Kanade. “Ah, you three are eager! If you wanna spend some private time together, be my guest! Don't worry, I'm not the jealous type. Although,” she grins mischievously at Ena, “you might wanna be careful, someone strikes me as jealous and needy~.”
“Hey!” Ena pouts. “I’m not jealous.”
“So when you walked in on me and Mafuyu kissing in the kitchen earlier, you definitely weren’t feeling left out, and so I didn’t need to kiss you after?”
“That’s not-”
“Oh! What about the Yuki left the call early to, and I quote, ‘cuddle Kanade to sleep’, and you spent the rest of the call sulking about how you couldn’t be with them, so you decided to organise another sleepover not even a week from the last?”
“Well, who wouldn’t want to cuddle her girlfriends?” Ena crosses her arms.
“... you can cuddle me if you want, Ena.” Kanade quietly adds.
“I know, Kanade.” Ena smiles. “Mizuki is just being a menace.”
“Hey! I’ll have you know I’m simply making an observation! What, can I not look at my beautiful Ena anymore?” Mizuki dramatically slumps into the couch. “What a cruel world we live in.”
Ena just rolls her eyes, turning back to Mafuyu. “So, do you want to… y’know, Mafuyu?”
“I do not know.”
Ena sighs, pinching her brow. “Do you want to have sex, Mafuyu.”
“I think so.”
“Why do you think that?” Kanade presses. She hopes Mafuyu knows it’s not an expectation within a relationship, or anything like that.
“When I am around you three, I feel warm.” Mafuyu begins. “Sometimes, that warmth moves down, and becomes hot. And I feel itchy and restless. And then I feel a wetness in my vulva-”
“Woah, woah!” Mizuki suddenly pipes up, urgently miming a cross with her hands. “I think we get the idea there, Mafuyu! No need to elaborate!”
Mafuyu tilts her head, confused, but stops. “I was simply explaining a feeling. Kanade asked.”
“W-well, that certainly sounds like arousal.” Kanade feels moved. She makes Mafuyu feel like that? “And Mafuyu, you think that sex with… us, would be a way to relieve those feelings?”
“Yes.”
“Well, okay.” Kanade nods. Mafuyu clearly has thought a lot about this. Kanade is thankful that she is finally opening up about her own wants and desires more, especially considering the… difficult situation with her mother as of late. “I’m glad you’re bringing this up, then.”
“Yeah.” Ena nervously smiles. “But, uh, what exactly do we need to talk about, then?”
“Considering the nature of our relationship, it’s important to clarify - are we all comfortable with other members having sex with each other?” Mafuyu asks next. “I am fine with it.”
“Y-yeah, I’m one hundred percent fine with it!” Mizuki reaffirms, though to Kanade her voice sounds forced.
“You sure, Mizuki?” Ena asks, clearly having also caught on.
Mizuki looks around anxiously, before sighing. “Yeah, I’m sure. As long as you don’t get yourselves hurt when you’re with each other, okay?”
“We won’t.” Mafuyu reassures. “That is why this is an important conversation.”
“Yeah, we love each other. I’d never do something if I thought it was going to hurt any of you.” Ena adds.
Kanade simply nods in agreement. When Mizuki smiles in return, Kanade figures she should add her own answer to Mafuyu’s question.
“I have absolutely no problem with any of you having sex with each other. I trust you all.”
“Same here.” Ena adds. “Regardless of what Mizuki might imply.”
“Hey, I wasn’t implying, I was explicitly stating.”
“If that is the case,” Mafuyu cuts off the impending argument. “Then are we also comfortable with seeing each other having sex.”
“Woah, kinky.” Mizuki drawls.
“I am not referring to voyeurism, although we can discuss that at a later date if it is of interest.” Mafuyu elaborates. When she notes the confusion and surprise on her girlfriend's faces, she continues. “Perhaps it is better to explain with an example. If I were to strip Kanade right at this instant and thrust my fingers into her, would that make anyone uncomfortable.”
This elicits an immediate flustered response from the three of them.
“What???”
“Oh, wow, okay, huh, uh-”
“I, uhm, I wouldn’t mind?!”
“Kanade!?” Both Ena and Mizuki yelp.
Kanade blinks rapidly, as she feels her body heat up while realising that she spoke that thought aloud. Oops.
“Well, if it makes you happy, I really don’t mind…” She shrinks into herself, feeling her blush strengthening. If it would help Mafuyu discover more about herself…
“I think that would be moving way too fast!” Ena yells quickly.
“Definitely.” Mizuki breathes out.
“So you see my point.” Mafuyu deadpans. She pauses, humming. “Would you like to know if any party is engaging in sexual activities? Because feelings could change after today, and so it could be easier if any interested parties ask the full polycule if there is full consent. That way we can resolve any problems that may arise as they come up.”
Kanade, still flustered, can see the merit. It’d be nice to feel caught up to any changes in the relationship dynamics, in a way that doesn’t feel invasive or hurtful. “That sounds like a smart idea.”
“But, like, you shouldn’t have to ask us for our consent as long as you’re doing it consensually, right?” Mizuki laughs. “I already said I’m fine.”
“It feels more polite.” Mafuyu elaborates.
“Polite, she says.” Mizuki mutters. “Sure, sure, if it makes you feel better!”
“It… could help with feeling left out.” Ena muses.
“Then, I think that is all the important aspects discussed. As long as we continue communicating, we should be able to maintain a healthy relationship.” Mafuyu smiles. “We can agree to let each other know if any major developments occur.”
“Yes. Thank you for bringing this up, Mafuyu. You handled it very well.” Kanade praises.
“As embarrassing as it is, I guess it is important.” Ena grouses. “Uh, I’m happy if, like, things happen, so like… yeah.” She grimaces, blushing.
“Wow, ‘things happen’! How very specific, Enanan!” Mizuki teases.
“Oh, shut up, you-”
As Kanade watches the two begin their affectionate bickering, she can't help but frown as she thinks back on the brief but eventful discussion. During that whole conversation, Mizuki never actually said if she was ok with sex. She never said she wasn’t, but considering her penchant for avoiding her issues and running away from her problems…
It’s probably fine, right? Mizuki was likely just awkward with the topic. Ever since that day that Ena chased her down in the alleyway, she’s been doing a lot better with actually telling them about her issues and concerns, instead of hiding them behind her carefree facade.
But maybe that assumption is unsafe to make - it’s only been a few months since that day, and a few weeks since they officially got together.
Kanade resolves herself to be more observant of Mizuki in the future. She doesn’t want her to feel uncomfortable around Niigo.
Yuki: K and I are going to have sex. Is that ok?
Ena blinks at the message she receives, then rubs her eyes and rereads it, just to be sure.
It hasn’t even been a week since that conversation at Kanade’s house, and they’re already going to..? She supposes that it’s nice of Mafuyu to keep her word about asking everyone, but the fact that she could just say that so out of the blue…
Amia: wow that was fast
Amia: have fun ;P
Mizuki responded rather fast. Is she not also a flustered mess at the thought? What do Kanade and Mafuyu look like right now? Are they both naked, in each other's arms, kissing, touching, feeling each other? Is Kanade a mess under Mafuyu’s unflinching, unashamed gaze? Maybe they already got started, before realising they promised to text, and-
K: Enanan?
Shit. She needs to formulate a response.
Enanan: fine by me. take care of each other!
That’s sufficient. What a completely normal response. Now she will not think about Mafuyu and Kanade carnally enjoying each other's presence, and instead focus back on her art for their latest song. She actually manages it for about five minutes before another message breaks her attention.
Amia: ur both offline so I assume you horndogs immediately jumpd to it but
Amia: we still on for our call tonight?
Amia: or will u be too… exhausted ;)
Enanan: amia what do you think
Amia: yeah probly not lmao
Amia: they could just be going for a quickie tho u never know~~
Amia: bet yukis got all kinds of tricks tho K will be wiped ;)
Amia: maybe shell actually rest properly thatd be nice tbh
Amia: who u think tops
Enanan: dont speculate like that its rude
Amia: bet u were thinkin bout it tho
Enanan: no i wasnt shut
Enanan: and if u bein srs
Enanan: top and bottom are like barely a real thing
Amia: are they??? who made u the expert
Enanan: shut
Enanan: it comes from gay men. think abou tit
Amia: thinking about tits got it.
Enanan: omfg shut up
Enanan: but whats a top and a bottom.
Amia: uhhhhhh
Amia: i mean its what it says
Enanan: if ur missionary about it ig but like what if im fingering u am I a top then
Amia: wow rather forward of u enanan~~
Enanan: or like yuki fingering K stfu amia
Amia: idk
Amia: ig that makes yuki the top???
Enanan: what if theyre fingering each other at the same time. two tops??? its lowkey stupid
Amia: well they’re both kinda dom abt it right???
Enanan: thats bdsm thats a completely seperate thing
Amia: youve thought alot abt this havent u
Enanan: shut up i have lesbian friends ok
Amia: sounds like bottom talk to me!
Enanan: ignoring u
Enanan: anyway dont speculate on what K and yuki could be doing rn
Amia: tell that to urself u just said they fingering each other
Enanan: omg amia shut upppppppppp
Ena huffs as she pushes her laptop away. Loathe as she is to admit it, she has been thinking about what Mafuyu and Kanade could be doing right now. And how much she wishes she were there instead, letting her hands roam one of their bodies as they do the same. What would Kanade's voice sound like as she loses control. Would her trained vocal chords make her loud, or would she whimper? What about Mafuyu? They’re both so beautiful, and sexy, and Ena hasn’t seen them without any clothes on, as much as she desperately wants to, and…
She’s not finishing her work tonight.
Ah, what the hell. May as well indulge herself for a bit.
Quickly getting up to make sure her door is firmly shut, she lays herself down on her bed, moving a hand underneath the waistband of her pants to tease at her clit. Sighing in relief, she starts to build towards a rhythm, rubbing back and forth as she lets her mind wander.
She could imagine Mafuyu's fingers instead, teasing with her fingers while staring at her with that flat expression, nothing but the slightest tilt of her lips indicating her true emotion…
“Ah, Ena.” Mafuyu murmurs, her voice husky. “You’re so beautiful, you’re making me unbearably warm.” She grinds herself against Ena’s hip, moaning, while her hands continue their mission of pleasuring Ena.
“Ah, Mafuyu…” Ena whines. “Please, Please…”
Or maybe Kanade, nervous but genuine in her affections…
“Ena, I know I’m… not very good at this…” Kanade whimpers, “but I think I can pleasure you while you pleasure me, if…”
“Y-yes, Kanade?” Ena breathes out.
“Uhm, I’m going to use my tongue, but I’ll… lie down like this…” Kanade down beside Ena, with her vulva right in front of her face. “Um, and you can… also..!”
Ena immediately dives in, working her tongue on Kanade while she does it in return, building up towards their climax…
Ena knows her fantasies aren’t very realistic, or based on any experience, but… they’re hot. She’s getting close. Picking up the speed of her ministrations, she pictures what her third girlfriend could be like…
“Mizuki, please get closer!” Ena pleads, moving her legs between Mizukis, rotating to get the pressure in just the right spot.
“Wow, someone's desperate, huh, Enanan?” Mizuki purrs. “Come on, I’ll help your needy little self…”
“Not needy…” Ena grumbles, then gasps as she feels a wet pressure against her clit.
“You sure about that one?” Mizuki grins, then leans in closer to make out with Ena. Ena whines into her mouth, as the two start to gyrate their hips in alignment with each other, scissoring each other and feeling as much of each others skin as they-
Ena pauses. Despite how close she is, something nags at her at the back of her mind. Something… so important as to interrupt this fantasy.
She briefly remembers the face of Mizuki on the rooftop, horrified.
Shit. Mizuki is trans. Which… means her anatomy is different. Which means that this fantasy is extremely detached from reality.
That’s… that’s fine, Ena’s really close anyway, she just needs to adjust her fantasies a bit, and…
Mizuki pushes Ena down, grinning predatorily, and then she-
How do… dicks work. How do they…
Uh.
Mizuki grabs Ena’s torso, and then something large, meaty, solid, pushes up against her vaginal entrance. And then she feels herself wrap around Mizuki’s dick, its massive size filling her up, and Mizuki begins thrusting, and…
No. No, that’s…. No. Ena feels her arousal slowly leaving her body, replaced instead with a growing frustration. Is this… turning her off? That’s… that’s her girlfriend she’s thinking about! Her beautiful, cute, pretty, attractive pink haired girlfriend, and Ena’s heart always flutters when she sees her! She… her girlfriend is hot!
She… she knows her girlfriend is trans. She doesn’t have a problem with that. She loves her! She’s glad her girlfriend was able to find herself, and be someone she’s happy as! And she promised that it wouldn't change anything! And it hasn’t!
“I'm sure, starting from tomorrow too, you'd talk with me as if nothing happened...!”
But… was Ena just… ignoring it? If she almost forgot in her own fantasy, this secret that was so massive as to cause… the entirety of the festival’s aftermath, and so much hell in Mizuki's life? While Ena wasn’t dismissive and told Mizuki she still loved her, has she really embraced that part of her? Has she just been reinforcing Mizuki’s fears that she expressed after the festival?
Hell, since that day she came out, she doesn’t even think she’s really had a talk with her about what being trans is like.
Fuck, she thinks as she begins to feel tears of both frustration and horror fall down her face. Is she transphobic?
No, no, Mizuki is a girl! And so she’ll treat her like a girl! Because she’s a girl! She just…
Fuck.
It’s just because of the dick, right? It’s… she’s a lesbian, so it makes sense she doesn’t like those, right? Is….
Scrambling for her phone, she grabs it and urgently brings up a search query.
dos nt likig penis makeme tranphobee lesbian
The millisecond load time feels like it takes forever. Then she starts to find opinions and unfamiliar terms. Genital preference is a thing. But scrolling further - it looks like it’s got some transphobic subtext, and everyone who cries about it seems to be making a big deal out of nothing. But it’s also an accepted part of sexual preferences that doesn’t inherently mean you’re transphobic.
Fuck. So maybe it doesn’t make her a morally corrupt person. That’s a bare minimum standard. Still. She doesn’t want to stop at just “not being a transphobe”. She wants to be able to love her beautiful girlfriend, to reassure her, and not freak out when they… do things, together.
lesbian with trans girlfrend how like penis
And she cringes when porn sites turn up almost IMMEDIATELY. She feels sick.
But there's a small silver lining of threads talking about… lesbian sex with trans women. And how it doesn’t have to be penetrative. And Ena feels stupid as she reads a bit more, and realises that that much was obvious.
But she still finds herself repulsed at the idea of Mizuki’s dick. Even though that’s her girlfriend.
Fuckkkkkkkk.
Ena screams into her hands. Enough of this. She said she’d support Mizuki, and she wants to support Mizuki, but she clearly hasn’t delved into just what that means, or how it feels to be Mizuki. She needs to learn. Maybe learning will make everything seem less… intimidating. And then she can enjoy… that part of her, as well! Like a good girlfriend should!
That’s smart. She can do research, for her girlfriends’ sake!
And she has a convenient excuse as well - no Nightcord meeting tonight means she has some unexpected free time. And while she did just waste a decent chunk of that failing to relieve her sexual frustration, she still has more than enough time to start properly looking into trans issues!
And most importantly, she will learn to love all of her girlfriend, including her penis!
Ena smiles as she begins going down a new internet rabbithole. She will not remain ignorant!
Mizuki frowns at Ena from across the diner the two were relaxing at. This entire date, she’s been… off. Not responding as much to her teasing as much, almost forgetting to order anything, and she even turned up later than usual. Now Ena is starting to space out, staring distantly in Mizuki’s direction. Maybe she’s still thinking about how Kanade and Mafuyu went last night? They never elaborated on how it went, aside from a short “it was nice :)” from Kanade, and an “I enjoyed it” from Mafuyu, which really doesn’t say anything.
Mizuki’s trying not to think too hard about it herself - she’ll only make herself jealous of something she knows she can’t have.
“Ena, you alright there? Is little old me not enough for you?” Mizuki tilts her head, hoping to bring her girlfriend out of whatever funk she’s found herself in. Ena jumps, making eye contact.
“Ah, yeah. Sorry. I was just… thinking.” She responds, and then looks at Mizuki again. Mizuki narrows her eyes, paying more attention to where exactly Ena is staring, and-
Ah. Ena’s looking at her chest.
See, Mizuki doesn’t have a problem with this, in theory. God (Miku) only knows how often Mizuki has found her own eyes drawn to the many beautiful breasts she has come across in her lifetime. But… Mizuki is painfully aware of how her own is lacking, in certain areas. Despite her best efforts and wishes, she hasn’t really grown much there, instead choosing to divert attention from it with her choice of fashion.
“Uh, Ena? Thinking about what?” Mizuki tries for a teasing tone, but curses as that undercurrent of anxiety leaks out. Judging by Ena’s soft glance, she catches it.
“Mizuki, uh, I was just…” Ena starts, strangely nervous, before she sighs and tries to speak again, more firmly.
“Your chest-”
“Ah-”
“I never noticed, but it’s not especially large-”
“Way to point out the obvious-” Mizuki tries to cut her off, cold dread creeping up her spine.
“-And I was reading and I know that can cause… dysphoria, I think, um,” Ena, much to Mizuki’s dismay, continues, “but you know you can get, uh, hormones for that?”
Wait.
“Uh, like, medically. It's a thing. You can get estrogen and blockers and it can… change your body to align more with what you want it to be, and… grow breasts, and change fat distribution, and other changes.” Ena finishes, blushing slightly.
Mizuki blinks. “Are you messing with me?” She asks, her voice small, body tensing as that quiet voice telling her to run slowly gets louder.
“No! I’m- it’s an actual thing! It’s really cool!” Ena beams, and oh, she’s actually being genuine.
Mizuki closes her eyes, deeply regretting agreeing to indulge Ena today. She supposes she was lucky that she managed to evade any discussions on her transness for as long as she had managed to (ignoring the bitter part of her that wishes it was bought up even once after she came out, after all the stress of hiding and running away because of it).
How does she even respond to Ena right now? The truth? ‘Yes, I’ve been on HRT for a while now, and it hasn’t really given me much in the way of breasts yet, and I’m terrified that it never will’? Then that’ll just make Ena feel guilty for bringing it up, or worse, make Ena want to break up with her as she finally realises just what Mizuki being trans could mean for their relationship. Ena is a lesbian, after all.
Lie? ‘Oh, wow, I never knew! Thank you for telling me, Ena!’? No, that would… Mizuki is an expert in deflection and evasion, but outright lying is difficult. Especially to Ena.
Mizuki affixes her gaze towards the ceiling, leaning back against her diner seat. She feels a buildup of a less familiar emotion, although unlike Mafuyu she does recognise it as a mild resentment towards Ena for bringing this up, as if Mizuki doesn’t know about her own identity. But Ena probably doesn’t know any better, and it’s not like Mizuki exactly ever… talked to her, right? So it’s not really her fault.
Still.
“Wow, Ena,’ She drawls, still staring at the ceiling. “Didn’t know you were so interested in my boobs.” Perfectly sufficient. Only a slight amount of her frustration coming out. Excellently played, Mizuki!
“Oh my god, Mizuki.” Ena groans. “I’m trying to be nice.”
“Well, you’re not doing a very good job, huh?” Mizuki responds immediately, before freezing as she realises she didn’t filter that one out. Abort, abort!
“Eh? I’m not sure what I-”
Mizuki cuts Ena off with a laugh. “If you want some groping action, Mafuyu’s definitely got the goods for it. And apparently, she has the desire lately as well!”
“Mizuki, you know that’s not what I meant!” Ena scolds.
“Oh, so you don’t want to shove your face in her warm bosom, Enanan?”
“Mizuki, just-”
“I’ll have to tell her, I’m sure she’ll be very disappointed! She seemed quite eager at Kanade's place last time, huh?”
“Mizuki.”
“Maybe you could ask Kanade how they feel, if you’re oh so deprived at this instant, since I’m sure she’s had her hands all over her-”
“Mizuki, shut up! I get it!” Ena yells, drawing a few wary glances from some of the other patrons. When she determines nothing is wrong, Ena sighs, and continues.
“What’s wrong?” Ena asks, voice full of genuine concern and affection. “You’re deflecting way more than usual.”
“Ah, it’s…” Mizuki bites her lip. She doesn’t want to get upset at Ena.
“Do you… not want to be on hormones?” Ena asks, and Mizuki hates how careful and hesitant she is talking, and her pitying gaze. Somehow that's enough, and some kind of wound up thread violently snaps within Mizuki. She balls up her fist, resting it against the tabletop. The truth it is, then.
“Ena.” She begins, saccharine. “Do you think I am somehow unaware of HRT?”
Ena’s face falls, and Mizuki’s heart twinges. “A-ah. I… suppose you would know more than I would..?”
“I’m on hormones, Ena.” She hisses through grit teeth.
“Oh.” Ena responds. “I… see.” Mizuki pretends she imagines the disappointment in her tone.
“Yeah.”
A heavy silence falls between them, the chatter of other patrons feeling remarkably distant. MIzuki takes a deep breath, unclenching her fist and relaxing back against the seat.
Ena breaks the silence first. “How… long?”
Mizuki grimaces. “Why does it matter?”
“I guess it doesn’t.” Ena concedes.
While that’s the answer Mizuki wanted, she can’t help but feel… disappointed. She hasn’t gotten to share that with anyone, because… it’d be acknowledging she was different. But sometimes she wishes she could tell someone about all the changes going on in her body, laugh about how sensitive her nipples are right now, gush over her slowly rounding body. But she just wants to be… a girl, like the rest of them. And girls dont… go through that, not at this age.
“Mizuki,” Ena begins, cutting Mizuki out of her musing. “I just… you told us that big secret about yourself, and trusted us all with it, and I was doing some thinking last night, about, uh, things, and I realised… I haven’t been especially great to you since then, really.”
“What?” Mizuki questions. “No, you’ve… treated me like you did before. You treated me… no differently from any other girl. That’s all I wanted.”
“That’s exactly the problem!” Ena exclaims. “I’m treating you like you're a regular girl, but you’re not!”
Mizuki’s previous cold dread is overtaken by freezing horror, her body suddenly feeling as if it was dunked in ice.
“You do have differences from me, and Mafuyu, and Kanade, and I’ve just been ignoring them, because you’re a girl, but my narrow minded-”
Mizuki barely processes what Ena is saying, as she pushes the remnants of her food away and picks up her bag. Checking her phone to give the slightest pretense of an excuse, Mizuki stands.
“S-sorry, Ena, I have to go. Uh, something just came up! Sorry! I’ll see you on Nightcord!” She urgently says, with only a token amount of her usual bubbliness.
“Wait, Mizuki?!” Ena calls out to her, but Mizuki is already exiting the diner, breaking out into a sprint once Ena is firmly out of sight.
She thought she was done running away, but running is always what she’s best at. She just… thought Ena was safe. She is safe. She’s just being… ignorant. Mizuki knows that, logically, she didn’t mean any harm, but…
“I’m treating you like you're a regular girl, but you’re not!”
Does she see her like that? Is that… is she going to treat her differently now?
No, no, she’ll hopefully just forget, surely. If Mizuki can just continue acting… like herself (whoever that is), then Ena won’t be concerned, and they can go back to being normal.
Hopefully.
Mafuyu decided to join tonight's Nightcord meeting with Kanade sitting beside her. After the previous night, where she discovered so many new, positive, feelings, she is finding herself unable to get enough of Kanade's touch - she just wants to be held, and to hold her in turn. More than she’s ever wanted anything in her life. Kanade said she didn’t mind.
They had skipped last night's call, and aside from some simple communications, hadn’t really talked with the other members of their group. So it was important not to miss tonight's call - but Mafuyu didn’t want to leave Kanade’s side after discovering this feeling, this wonderful, soft feeling.
She thinks she wants to share this feeling. With all of her girlfriends. They deserve to feel it as well.
So that’s why they were sharing Kanade’s room tonight, Kanade on her lap. Likely not the best for productivity, but… she can always return to her room later.
“Mafuyu… should I turn on the camera?” Kanade asks.
“Sure.” Mafuyu responds, eyes half closed. The sound of a nightcord call encourages her reluctantly to wake up properly, pulling away just slightly from Kanade's neck to see the screens properly.
Ena joins within a few seconds, her camera remaining off. She stays silent for longer than usual.
“Enanan.” K greets warmly. Mafuyu smiles at the camera, hoping she can see.
“Uh, hey K. Wow. I was wondering if Yuki… but I guess. You two look close.” Ena sounds… confused?
“Is there something wrong, Enanan?”
“Oh, no, you’re allowed to, I just…” Ena trails off.
Kanade hums. “Are you… jealous?”
“What? No! I wouldn’t be…” a sigh. “Maybe a little. Don’t stop on my behalf though!”
Mafuyu nods. “When you next come over, I can cuddle you instead. It is pleasant.” Kanade hums and nods in agreement.
“Oh, uh, well, only if you want.” Ena murmurs. Mafuyu imagines the embarrassed pout on her face. The thought makes her smile slightly, again. She’s been doing that a lot lately around Niigo.
“Where’s Amia?” K queries.
“I… I don’t know.” Ena sighs. “I think I might have messed up today.”
“What did you say to her?” Mafuyu immediately asks, flatly.
“Well, I was trying to be, y'know, nice and supportive, and-”
The sound of someone else joining the call cuts Ena off.
“Yoo-hoo! Wow, you two look cozy!” Amia’s energetic voice immediately cuts through the previous tension. Then her voice drops low, into something almost seductive. “So, how was the sex?”
“MizukI!” Ena scolds. “You can’t just- augh!”
“Why not?” Mafuyu tilts her head. “Are we not supposed to be open about this? I enjoyed the experience very much. It is… a strong feeling. I like it.”
“That’s-!” Ena lets out a long sigh. “Whatever.”
Kanade wiggles in Mafuyu’s hold. “It was nice. Um. I don’t know what else to say? Mafuyu is… really pretty. And kind. And hot.” She quietly finishes. Mafuyu can see her blushing in the camera.
“Uhuh.” Mizuki drawls. “Well, as long as you two are happy~”
“Mafuyu is hot.” Ena mumbles, quiet enough that it may not have been meant to be picked up by the mic.
“I have been told as much, yes.” Mafuyu nods. “I believe I approach the ‘ideal female form’ more than the rest of us, due to my genetic luck giving me ample breasts and hips, and maintaining my physical fitness granting excellent musculature. I have no problem with you three enjoying that.”
“Mafuyu!” Ena screams. “You can’t just… oh my god, you are so full of yourself, huh?”
“Told you, Enanan. She’s not wrong either. Certainly more to boast about than you.” Mizuki snarks.
“I- well it's not like you have-!” Ena cuts herself off with a sharp breath. Mizuki, notably, doesn't rise up to the bait. “I’m sorry.” Ena sounds extremely apologetic, enough to trigger some worry in Mafuyu.
“What are you apologising for?” Mizuki cuts back, way sharper than her usual teasing. What did Ena say?
“I- you know, I- just…” Ena trails off. “You’re pretty.” She almost sounds pleading.
“You’re apologising for me being pretty.” Mizuki deadpans. “Wow.”
“No! You know what I- I mean it. You’re pretty. Even if your chest is- I mean, you- I’d love to see you naked?” Ena sputters. “Wait- I mean, not that- I mean I would, but also-”
“Enanan.” Mizuki responds again. “Step one to getting out of a hole is to stop digging.”
“Right.”
The call remains silent.
“Uh, so, tonight, I was thinking…” Kanade starts, trying to divert from whatever that was. “I have this demo I’ve been working on, and I’ll send it over now…”
The call manages to remain stable once they all get on track with their work, and discussions around the song. But it’s quieter than usual, with Ena and Mizuki seeming to have mutually agreed to cut the usual banter tonight. Mafuyu doesn’t like it. She wants her girlfriends to be happy, and comfortable around each other, but she has no clue what the current cause of tension is.
Did they have insecurities about their physical attractiveness? Mafuyu thought such an idea was absurd, because they’re two of the three most beautiful people she’s ever met. But maybe they do not see that in themselves? During a lull in conversation, Mafuyu decides to pipe up.
“I think both of you are extremely attractive.” She starts, trying to remember her observations from when she is around them. “I enjoy seeing you. Neither of you should be concerned about your physical attractiveness. I find you both alluring. It is often difficult to look away.”
Silence. Kanade turns to her in confusion, then understanding.
“What Mafuyu said holds true for me. You don’t… have to worry about me finding her more attractive, just because she has… more assets in certain areas. There's beauty in all body types. I love you two very much.” She reassures them.
“I… I wasn’t insecure.” Ena mumbles. “But thanks.”
A long gap of silence falls between them again.
“Uh, yeah. I’m fine.” Mizuki's voice is hoarse briefly, then she coughs. “Appreciate the sentiment, though!” She yawns dramatically. “Wow, it’s been a bit, I think I need to call it in for the night!”
“It’s not… that late?” Mafuyu queries.
“Ah, I’m just a bit tired, y’know? Gotta get my beauty sleep to keep those eyebags from growing!”
“I think your eyebags are fine.” Mafuyu states.
“I don’t.” Mizuki disagrees quietly, before immediately cheering up again. “Uh, I mean, good night, everyone! Sleep well! With whatever definition of that word you two are doing~”
“I think we’ll just be sleeping normally…” Kanade responds.
“Okay, okay! Cya!”
Mizuki hangs up.
Mafuyu frowns. “Mizuki has been getting worse recently.”
“Yeah…” Ena’s voice quavers.
“I wonder if…” Kanade murmurs. “Is she… okay with us?”
“I think so.” Ena reassures. “Or, at least, she’s not upset at you specifically. I hope.”
“She hasn’t been like this since before the festival.” Mafuyu hums. “Is it something related to her identity?”
“Probably.” Ena sighs. “I realised that I’ve kind of really messed up there. I… haven’t really acknowledged her being trans at all. I… actually forgot, for a bit. I felt awful. I’m trying to better educate myself now. But I know I hurt her today.”
“She’s obviously dysphoric about her chest.” Kanade muses.
“Obviously?” Ena asks, urgent.
“Well, once she told us, I started to notice how often her outfits put… frills, and embellishments, and distractions, around the chest area?” Kanade explains. “I never asked, but everything Mizuki wears is very intentional, so…”
“I hadn’t thought of that.” Mafuyu remarks. “But you’re likely correct.”
“Huh…” Ena sounds dejected.
“And, also, I think… that’s not the only thing she's uncomfortable about, with her body.” Kanade fidgets in place. “You should ask her yourself if you… are thinking about it, but… maybe since me and Mafuyu have… had sex, that dysphoria… it’s more on her mind..?”
“That would be the most logical conclusion.” Mafuyu agrees.
“Uhm, but I’d ask her yourself. Without being weird about it.” Kanade continues. “She’s clearly uncomfortable.”
“Mm.” Ena hums. Mafuyu thinks she would like to see her and Mizuki in person again soon, in order to better reassure them.
“We should have another sleepover.” Mafuyu concludes. “Being physically close makes me feel better, and that way we can reassure Mizuki. Also, if Ena wants to do anything, like cuddling, or sex, it is easier if she is sharing the same space as me.”
“E-eh? Why would I want to-!” Ena starts
“It was merely a suggestion. I am open to it. I do not want you to feel jealous.” Mafuyu smirks. “And I should share Kanade with both of you.”
“W-we can meet up in Sekai…” Kanade suggests.
“I do not want to have sex with Miku watching.” Mafuyu deadpans.
“Mafuyu!”