1 - 20 of 449 Bookmarks by Temebrai
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D is angry, Dirk is around. D takes out his anger on Dirk's ass and pussy. (This is not safe/sane/consensual in any way)
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Dave comes home from school on a normal day to find something drastically different about Bro, and everything changes because something that was always present is suddenly missing.
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nobody is as close to god as dirk's brother.
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Your name is David Marie Lalonde, award-winning director of the SBaHJ mOivEi franchise, proud older brother to the most adorable and most precocious seven-year-old boy genius, and avid collector of dope dead shit, and you’re in the middle of checking yourself into an Express Heat Facility, or as you like to call them, glorified glory holes.
(Or: In which hotshot Hollywood director Dave Lalonde has a meet-cute in a glory hole.)
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★ ★ ☆ ☆ ☆
the dick was bomb but he was kinda mean to me
will abso-fucking-lutely ride again tho- D. Lalonde (Verified User)
(Or: In which David Lalonde hires a heat companion and gets Bro Strider instead. Except, not really.)
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It was addictive, the fear. The way it flowed and brimmed inside his head and ate him from the inside out. Dave couldn't decide if he wanted to run screaming, tear out his eyes, or just cry. All he knew was that what he needed he could only get from Gamzee. He took a step forwards, even as he felt claws running through his insides, and Dave didn't even care if they were real or not.
Series
- Part 3 of Painful Needs
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Dave leans forward. You can see a camera reflected in his shades, in the high-rez screen, you can see his own face peering out of the camera in his shades, his reflection reflecting itself into infinity. Not you. You’re not there -- he’s not here.
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Say what you want about trailer trash, but growing up in this environment offers a unique perspective on life.
Or: Dirk Strider grows up in a trailer park, all the while acutely aware of his billionaire older brother that has no idea he exists living two states away.
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What you're doing is wrong. You know it's wrong. It's so wrong that it has literally broken the scale of things that are wrong and it's floating off in this space of things that are just-- wrong. Everything is completely wrong.
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Little Old Place Where We Got Together (Love Shack, Baby!) by whimsicalAdoration
Fandoms: Homestuck
19 Jul 2026
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You’ve never had a one-on-one with him, thus everything you know is mostly from your brother. And while you trust Dave’s word, it’s hard to believe a guy who tried putting on his jacket in the dark--and, evidently, needed help--is a conniving, cruel prankster with an atrocious taste in cinematography.
Well, you believe that last part. Just a little.
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Dirk and John are depressed and handling it in their own respective ways. Only now, they're together. And still handling it in their own respective ways.
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A very gentle hearted Rick takes in a lonely eye patched Morty, whom he finds during one of his missions, but unbeknown to him, the boy hasn’t felt the tenderness of touch in such a long time that he becomes infatuated with Doofus Rick. Every display of tenderness dooming him more in his pathetic secret love, such a deserving life for the most eminent criminal mind within the Mortys.
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Evil Morty has experienced a lifetime of suffering under the hands of Ricks. But when he's assigned to a pure and gentle ‘Doofus’ Rick, he begins to question his purpose in life.
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How to Get the Hottest Omega Alive: A Comprehensive Guide (With Annotations by Dave Strider) by Kogarasu_Maru
Fandoms: Homestuck
31 Jul 2026
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Bonding and Mateship is a complex affair, everyone struggles to find their One True Mate, that one person who completes you. Even the most famous, gorgeous omegas on Earth can attest it is no small task! What scent profile will get your ideal omega's attention? What will make you stand out from the crowd? Wonder no more!
We asked DAVE STRIDER, winner of Hottest Omega Alive seven years running, for his thoughts on the subject, and he delivered!
From his favorite scents to his do's and don't's for the Ideal Alpha, Dave Strider tells all. Check out these tips, and your omega is bound to be yours in no time flat.
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This is utterly miserable. You've been walking for goodness knows how long, which wouldn't be a problem, except you're also being sent on a wild civic goosechase just to find a gas station.
Your name is John Egbert, and when you run out of gas on a rural back road in the southwest, you find yourself stranded in a town that isn't on the map, and tangled in a web of bureaucratic nonsense.
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john had a long summer. it's about time casey gets a birthday party.
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Across the room, Dirk Strider stares you down. You get the feeling, if he weren’t wearing his dumb triangle shades, the two of you would be making some seriously intense and uncomfortable eye contact. It’s nearly impossible to look away. He’s posted against the wall, nursing a can of orange soda, not talking to anyone. Just like you.
Except you’re drinking hooch, not gross Fanta.
(Or, John Egbert is clueless and Dirk Strider doesn't have a clue.)
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The Longest Surviving Intern at Night Vale Community Radio by ElektricAngel
Fandoms: Welcome to Night Vale, Homestuck
07 Aug 2014
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A boy with red eyes and white hair walked into town today. He was carrying a long, sharp sword, which, according to some reports, was dripping with fresh blood. He wore a pair of dark glasses over his eyes.
So how do I know his eyes are red? Well, listeners, because he’s in the studio right now, staring at me.
He wants to know if I have a DJ position available.
This being a talk show with absolutely no music of any kind, I'm afraid I do not have such a position. However...an internship has just opened up.
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Your name is JAKE ENGLISH, and you’re tired of being a recluse. Life has given you the short end of the stick time and time again, so you sought for a break and found it within the company of an old friend.
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One day Dave knows he's going to fall in love with the prettiest girl ever, and then the black and white world will change into colour, and he'll know what the rainbow looks like and why people stare when they see his eyes (even though Bro tells them not to).
Because that's what happens, right? That's normal. People fall in love, they find their rainbow, and then everything is perfect! There's no way that won't happen for him!
...Right?
Series
- Part 1 of Sing a Rainbow