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Bilbo sighs as he blows his hair out of his face again. He looks through his things for any hair ties or scissors while grumbling. Bofur pops up beside him “you looking for something master baggins?” Bilbo moves his hair out of his eyes as he looks up “yes! Some scissors to cut my hair with! It's entirely too long!”
Bofur stills and stares at Bilbo for a very long moment “and why would you do that?” his voice has an edge of weariness to it. Bilbo looks up at Bofur and motions to his hair which is now to his lower back and thanks to bilbo's curly hair theres sticks, rocks and dirt all in his hair and its super matted. Bofur cringes at the state of Bilbo’s hair; he hadn't even realized his hair was so bad. Bilbo speaks up “my hair is far longer than any respectable gentlehobbit would keep it at.” Bofur tilts his head at that, he thinks back to his short time in the shire and realizes that everyone there had short hair with the longest being to the shoulders if that even. “Do hobbits not value hair?” Bilbo thinks for a sec before shaking his head “only the hair on our feet and even mine has become matted. We can't grow our hair out like other races due to how fast our hair grows when left unattended to. I normally get haircuts like….4 times a year? Maybe more if my dear aunt Elba has new scissors she wants to try out.” Bofur shivers at the idea of putting scissors to his hair THAT many times.
As bilbo goes back to going through his bag Nori comes up behind him looking at bofur confused. Bofur looks very conflicted as he looks over at his thief friend “he is um…looking for scissors so that he may cut his hair”
Nori’s eyes widen “and why would he do that?!” Bilbo sighs “Look at the state of it! No matter how much i try i can not fix it! It's too long! And it is not hobbit like!”
Nori also just now noticed the state of the hobbits hair, bilbo is normally in the back of their group so none of the company have noticed the mess that has become of the hobbits hair. Bilbo finally finds the scissors but nori quickly steals them from the hobbit and dashes “NORI!”
Nori quickly runs over to where Dori and Ori are sitting. He skids to a stop as he looks behind him to see Bofur holding the hobbit back and carrying him in the opposite direction as the hobbit yells and cusses…. Those are some creative insults..
Ori and Dori look up at Nori confused. Dori gives a glare to Nori “and what did you just steal from the hobbit? What have I told yo-” “bilbo was gonna cut his hair….so I stole the scissors” that makes Dori freeze, just like Nori knew it would. Ori looks over at the hobbit and cringes at the state of the hobbit's hair. Dori sees Ori cringes and when he looks over he feels like fainting at the horrendous state of the hair. “Ori….nori…. Get as much soap, brushes and hair ties as you can. I do not care who or where you get them from” the both nod and they quickly rush to get the items. They know the look on Doris' face and they are not getting in between him.
Nori runs over to Bofur where he's still holding Bilbo “i told Dori” Bofur pales at that as nori takes the hair ties from Bofur’s hair. Bilbo glares at Nori “give me back my scissors” Nori shakes his head “nope im gonna let Dori handle you” he says before running off again.
Fili and Kili look at Ori confused as Ori had came over telling fili that Dori wants all extra hair ties (He doesn't even bother asking Kili knowing the youngest Durin either last all his or just never brought them and uses Fili’)
Fili raises an eyebrow “whyyyyy??” Ori nods over to dori and then bilbo “soooo um…Nori brought to Doris attention Bilbo's hair and now he wants everything…hes probably gonna need everything” Kili looks over Ori’s shoulder and cringes “Wow…Mister Boggins hair is worse then MINE!”
Fili looks at bilbo and then Ori “....why is his hair so bad? I would've thought mister baggins would've taken care of his hair with how neat and proper he is”
Ori shrugs “no idea” Fili looks worried as he gives Ori all his extra stuff “um…imma go find out”
Kili follows fili as he goes to bilbo himself
Nori goes through the bags of everyone grabbing the soap, brushes (that are usable…he leaves Kilis and Bifurs alone) Oin looks at Nori as he just openly goes through the healer's bag “um…Nori what do you think you're doing?” Nori just points at Dori and then Bilbo before moving onto Gloin's bag. Oin cringes and nods
Soon Ori and Nori have their hands full of stuff that they bring to Dori. Dori leads them over to Bilbo and Bofur…and Bifur…. Bifur is holding the hobbits top half while Bofur is holding the lower half. Bofur had called his cousin over when bilbo had kicked the dwarf in the stomach…..bofur now has a stomach ache. Bilbo is still cussing them out, he doesn't like being held.
Dori stomps up “follow me we're dealing with that mess!” Bifur and Bofur nods as they carry the hobbit after the dwarf. Ori and Nori right behind them. Fili runs up to Dori “Can I help?” Dori raises an eyebrow at the blonde dwarf before shrugging “sure lad”
They get to the river. All the stuff is put on a rock while fili runs to get one of the bowls like dori asked.
Hours pass of Dori very slowly fixing the hobbits hair. Nori, Ori, Bifur and Bofur had quickly gotten out of there. When Thorin had tried to round up the group so they may move on he was quickly told that it was impossible. Thorin crosses his arms and narrows his eyes “and why is that?” Balin and Dwalin are beside him on a log and are very clearly listening in to what kili is saying. “Weelllll you see… Bofur noticed mister boggins going through his bag and had asked and the hobbit and something something Mister Boggins hair is a disaster and he was trying to cut it off and then Nori came over stole the scissors told Dori and now Dori has Bilbo trapped over there by the river fixing his hair and he told me he isn't moving till hes done…..also im more scared of Dori then you uncle…Dori can be scary.”
Balin raises an eyebrow “is that where my hair brush and clasps went?” Kili nods
Thorin sighs “...fine we will stay here today but only for today”
It takes the entire day for Dori and Fili to completely fix Bilbo’s hair. During which the hobbit tells the two about why hobbits cut their hair and the two dwarfs tell Bilbo why dwarfs value their hair.
Bilbo’s hair is braided into one big braid so that the hobbit can deal with it much easier. Along with two micro braids on either side of the hobbits face.
Along the entire journey once a month Dori forces them to stop for a day so that he may rebraid Bilbo’s hair. He teaches Bilbo to braid using Ori’s hair.
By the time they reach Emebor Bilbo's hair reaches his knees but the length makes being stuck in the mountain so much worse. All the dwarfs are under the gold sickness and aren't focussing on anything else. Bilbo tries braiding his own hair but keeps messing up and by the time Thorin banishes him Bilbo’s hair is so much worse than before. During the battle thanks to the orc swords Bilbo's hair is cut at his elbow.
But thanks to the shorter hair he's able to make it to Fili and Kili saving them before they can die. Dwalin and Bilbo run over just in time in order to save Thorin. When Thorin sees bilbos messed up hair he cringes just knowing Dori is gonna be pissed.
After the battle Dori basically drags Bilbo off to the side and sits him down and starts braiding his hair. Bilbo just sits there kinda zoned out, suddenly a brown bead with silver details falls in front of his face at the end of one of the micro braids. Nori walks over and zones in on the bead before smiling. Bilbo raises an eyebrow, Nori smirks wider “you just got adopted” “wha-” Dori shushes Bilbo as he keeps braiding.
Its only afterwards once he decided to stay in Erebor that Ori lets him know that the bead in his hair represents the house of ri. Bilbo smiles at the bead in his hair hearing that….though now he does have to be mother henned by Dori more.